Sojourn of a Pilgrim

Misdirected love

2010-01-09T16:33:00.001+10:30

In light of the recent happenings back home in Malaysia, I thought I spent some time writing down my thoughts in a structured way to share with you what I think about it and also for me to be more at ease. (I have all these thoughts running to and fro between my mind and it drives me nuts – I’ve been waking up ridiculously early for the past few days and you can guess what are the first few thoughts)

For the uninformed, I will just attempt to summarize what happened. Due to what I believe is immature leadership, an issue that was considered as a ‘hot topic’ back home was not handled well. As a result, some churches have been victims of Molotov cocktails and of course, with that, a certain kind of unrest. By all means, visit any Malaysian news website, be it the mainstream ones or the radical ones and they would be able to do more justice in sharing with you the latest. Try Google J

I was disgusted when I first heard of it. Disgusted because well, it is just not right and that feeling developed into one of (pauses to think of a word).. I can’t put it into a word but it was along the lines of ‘man, what I am still doing here in Australia?’

As you can imagine then, the subsequent next few hours developed into a struggle with Him and myself.

I am a bit more at peace right now. I was reminded of course of a brief article I was reading a few days ago which expounded on Peter’s response to Jesus in John 13:37 ‘Lord, why can I not follow You now?’ The author went on to talk about worship, waiting and work and suggested that they should go as one and it is a discipline that must be developed.

I would imagine people would have various responses to what has been happening back home. Some may be further convinced that they should try even harder to migrate to another country, some would see it as another point of accusation towards the current government and capitalize on it, some might see it as license to do something radical and so forth.

What is our response as a follower of Jesus?

If there was one thing that I first thought of was, wow, what a fantastic opportunity for the Malaysian Church to unite as one. In my understanding and knowledge so far, unity amongst Malaysian churches have been sporadic or minimal. In John 17, Jesus prayed that ‘all may be one’ (verse 21) and we often forget that these were the last few moments before He was crucified and when read in the context of that, it just makes you sit up straight in your seat and wonder, maybe Jesus knew that Church disunity was a huge thing that would be lacking in the Universal Church today. I was further encouraged even more as the Bible teaches us that Jesus intercedes on our behalf to the Father today and one could suggest that unity is one thing that He is still praying for.

When one part suffers, all suffers. Persecution has always been there. It is just translated and expressed differently in various circumstances. And what happened can be seen as one form of persecution in its infancy. The Bible teaches us too that we must expect persecution if we are really following Him.

Some people’s FB status goes along the lines of ‘the only thing left to do is pray’ and well, I can’t help but wonder, it sounds a bit defeated.

‘You can do more than pray after you have prayed; but you can never do more until you have prayed’ -AJ Gordon

2 Timothy 3:1 But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: v2 For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy unloving…..

I am reminded too of the passage above that we are living in the last days and people will still have love, but a love that is misdirected. And I think at the core of it all, the cause of the recent events is a result of misdirected love.

I have friends who are out there in the mission field, back home in the middle of all the action and I sometimes wonder also, why can’t I go and join them yet. It’s like we’re in a football game and we are not losing (we won’t loseJ) but the team needs help and I’m on the substitutes bench and I know what I can do (or at least I think..) and I’m so eager to just run in and help but the Coach just looks at me and says, it’s not your turn yet.

Maybe I really am not ready yet.

To continue the analogy, I was taught too that if you can’t play, at least cheer them on so that is what I will do for now. I have been praying too that God would let me feel what they feel so that I can pray better and I will not get too comfortable with life here.

I learnt something while attending a Residential Bible School back when I was in my ‘teen-years’ (I can’t believe I just used that phrase) and I learnt that God did not give me a Malaysian passport to change it and so I will continue on with that belief.

New beginnings..

2010-01-01T12:49:00.011+10:30

And so, 2009 came just like that and left and it's 2010 already, just some pictures for your viewing pleasure from December

OCF Australia 51st National AGM at Port Klang Gospel Hall, that was a momentous one, will never forget that :)

Ah Kong's Birthday

Made breakfast on Christmas morning - Back in Adelaide

Tried a roast pork belly dish from Jamie Oliver's book. Turned out well. Only dish to be finished for Christmas dinner.

Flowers which were supposed to bloom on Christmas morning, man..feel so cheated by the florish shop now..its only blooming now. Oh well..haha..

Guess what came back with me to Adelaide :)

Got more cookbooks for Christmas presents. Thank you, Mr Chai :) ...was saying the other day too..us males are getting a tad bit domesticated already..haha..just a tad..

On a separate note, was just doing some reflecting this morning and setting down some goals and a thought came to me. One of the things that interest me is that how each generation (X, Y, Baby boomers) have traits which are specific to them and even more if I zoomed in on models, like for example, the Malaysian Youth from the 80's, we have similar wants. And so, I was thinking, from my conversations and observations with my peers, I realised that a lot us want change (some with noble reasons, some well..a bit selfish la), and we crave for significance, to be valued. I believe these 2 traits are linked.

The environment around us also helps further fuel that desire. Most of us are living in our 'parents world'. What we have today is what the generations before set in place. They set up the policies that we have today, the governments that lead us today, the tax rates we pay and so on...basically the way of life. And specifically with us coming from rather comfortable backgrounds, we like to have things our way. That could start in us a desire to want change..possibly. There are also groups of people who after having experienced much have come to the point to say that life is too short to do anything else, let us choose a life of significance and denied all form of selfish desires.

And I don't think there is good or bad in that, it's just how the way things are.

What the world needs today are visionary Christians who would make a stand for God and well influence how the world around us is developing. I'm not asking for us to control His hand to do what we want. That is not even possible. What I believe is that we need to start availing ourselves to let Him use us. Desires for change could sometimes be placed there in your heart by Him. Think about it this way, He could have allowed you to be a baby boomer for example, but He chose for you to be part of this generation and He allowed what happen to shape you for a reason..for such a time as this.

Tribute to my 4 legged friend

2009-11-13T08:01:00.002+10:30

When in grieve, writing always help.

And so we were told just recently that Amber (one half of the Wong family doggies) passed away. We were shocked and of course sad. It's interesting how one dog can have an impact not only to us as individuals but to us a family. Ask anyone of us and we will have our own stories to share about Amber.

I remember days of chasing her..literally. We were not very good owners, rarely took her out for walks. Whenever we left the gate slightly opened, she would dashed out and one of us would run after to catch her to bring her back. Our neighbours must have thought, 'crazy jokers chasing after their dog around the neighbourhood'.

I remember also days when she would just sit down and rest her head in between the grils of the door looking oh so adorable but we knew deep down, she wanted to get more food (eg. chicken bones which apparently are harmful to dogs). haha

And there was that time also when she jumped into the fish pond. That was funny...

She was also a 'friend' to me. Weird as it sounds, used to sit down with her and just talk to her while patting her. Knowing there was not a slight chance of her responding to my rants/complains in life, I shared quite a bit with her..haha. And interestingly enough, she would look back at me with her tongue hanging out and with a face that has no worries at all, and that was enough to remind me of the simple truth of sometimes, just take it easy.

Being away from home and her for quite a bit helps the grieving process but as I was talking to my sister, that we won't forget the memories. The many times she annoyed us and also the many more times she brought us joy.

It is interesting how God allows these kind of things. I believe its in His will too to have allowed us to have a dog and I believe He has also taught us some things through our 4 legged friend.

Once read the book 'Cat and Dog theology' by Bob Sjogren & Gerald Robison and it brought some interesting perspectives to our relationship with Him. And of course, having dogs yourself help to illustrate the examples better.

Thank You God for the memories and for Amber.

Bye Bye 'ber'..

Jamie's American Road trip

2009-10-26T20:49:00.003+10:30

And so I just finished watching the first episode of Jamie's American Road trip. Totally enjoyed it, always enjoy watching Jamie Oliver (i enjoy listening to the British accent so I could be bias..haha), he's touring America trying out the underground/local cuisines prepared by migrants. There was a chap which he met, a Colombian who works as a school bus driver by day and at nights, cooks for about 70plus homeless illegal migrants and distributes the food to them.

I was reminded of

Luke 4:18-19 The Spirit of the LORD is upon Me, because He has annointed Me to preach the gospel to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to set at liberty those who are oppressed; to proclaim the acceptable year of the LORD.

I get excited when I hear/see of churches who are integrated in their local communities doing acts of justice, defending those who are weak, feeding those who are hungry, being a channel for His power. I get even more excited when together with these, there is an active proclaimation of the gospel and lives being saved. And I know it is hard to strike a balance.

I'm reminded from a thought shared by K.P Yohannan in his book, 'Revolution in World Missions' where he makes the point that yes, it is important for a church to meet the social need but it is more important to meet the spiritual need as often, the physical needs are an expression of their spiritual state.

God, wake us up from our spiritual slumber that we may see how much we need You in our lives.

Gratefulness

2009-10-25T08:20:00.002+10:30

Sippin' a cup of warm Camomiile and Green Tea and eating lemon crisps from Arnott's...ah pure bliss...

I've never felt so 'aunty' before..hehehe.

Woke up rather early this morning and had a sudden urge to have them for breakfast as I spent the time reading His Word and reflecting.

I can't believe I'm excited for OCF Australia's National AGM, like uber excited! I was never one who fancied formality and 'motions' and all that sort. And I still don't think I am. I am excited more for what He is going to do through it and for the lives He is going to touch and also...it's going to be in Klang :)

Just like that. .

2009-10-23T22:13:00.002+10:30

And just like that, October's coming to an end and we will be into our 'last leg' for the year 09.

I was recently convinced by Ms Lee (all the way from UK) to go out to get the book, 'Boundaries in dating.' by Dr Henry Cloud and Dr John Townsend. I never thought i would invest in a book on relationships. The last and only book I have ever read on relationships was 'I kissed dating goodbye' by Joshua Harris. (I 'borrowed' it from a friend and haven't returned it..haha)

Interesting point: Cloud and Townsend made some remarks to debunk Harris' thoughts on dating in their first chapter. I was like, Woah, these 2 books would probably be the only books I will ever read on relationships and they potentially would offer 2 different views. But then again, I like to read/listen/hear what others think/say hence also the sudden impulse to invest in a book on relationships.

Just finished an autobiography-like book on Rees Howells and also 'A backpack and a bit of luck,' by Zhang Su Li, that was an enjoyable read.

The other books that I'm currently taking my time through also are 'Your Church. . can make a World of Difference' by Allan Webb and 'Coffee on the Terrace' by Bruce Grayden, a Wycliffe missionary who was based in the Phillipines.

for your amusement

2009-09-15T21:16:00.002+09:30

and so i got my salary and i was like all..oo..$$..haha..but it was a short-lived one..after dividing it to a few portions to be put here and there..i was left with very little and then it dawned upon me..this is going to be one lonng year..and here i was thinking....i dont hv to be a scrooge and look for cheap bargains anymore (it can be tiring sometimes - but i still get the kicks when i find a loaf of Helgas bread for AUD 2 tho) and then it hit me again too..earning my own moolah dosent equate to a more 'comfortable' life but the opposite actually.i've to be wise in my using them as I can't or at least shouldn't be running to Mama-Papa Sdn Bhd for $$ anymore..

and so..i went to harris-scarfe (probably aussie's equivalent of jusco) to look for some working socks. ive only got 1 pair (and no, i havent been re-wearing them everyday and end up developing athlete's foot) but ive been wearing my other like 'sporty' looking socks..everytime i sit down, i was a bit embarassed coz u know how the pants will be pulled up a bit revealing your socks hence the importance of choosing socks which will match your attire for the day.but after a while..i was like..hiya..cannot think too much..

but anyways..i went to harris-scarfe to look for working socks on sunday and i was so excited when i found a set of 3 for 15dollars reduced from 25..(and the chinese uncle would say....'pieerree cardin' one somee moree..i dont even know what brand it is..but i've a hunch that a typical chinese uncle would have that reaction) I just thought it would be easy to match as they were black in colour with minimal designs. and so i bought it feeling rather proud with myself for finding a bargain..

this morning when i wore one of them for the first time, i realised why they were reduced...

they didnt match!

the colour was the same but the way they were sewn together was different.like they had different thread pattern...one was plain, the other had lines...

i just laughed at myself..im still going to wear them..only someone who focuses on it can pick out the difference..i doubt ppl will actually like stare at my feet/ankle....but then again..i actually wear a quite striking colour shoe...oh well...

haha.

Interesting videos

2009-09-08T20:56:00.004+09:30

Both are on unity in a land deprived of it

but each has a different background to it.

1 week down, 51 more to go..

2009-08-29T18:34:00.003+09:30

Finished my first ever 6 days working week today. My rotation is set up in a way that will give me a 4 days working week, but that would mean extra work on some of the weeks and I so happen started in the week where i had to do a 6 days one.

Week 1: 5 days
Week 2: 6 days
Week 3: 4 days (my favourite...duhh!)
Week 4: 6 days

I still have my job..thank God :)

And this was how I celebrated my first week. I had a huge craving for McD's fries the whole day today and so right after work, went to the nearest McD's and ordered their new Angas beef burger value meal, for those who know what I'm talking about, you just got to try it. It's DA BOMB! haha..it was oh so satisfying! probably also due to the fact that I only had a cup of tea for lunch and some biscuits bcoz it was raining oh-so-heavily and i couldn't go out to get something. Will probably need to start packing food or keeping snacks in the locker or something..

Came back home, played 'Nigel Kennedy: Berlin Philharmonic Orchestra', swung open the balcony windows and took one of the nicest nap I've ever had. It just stopped raining so the weather was just perfect and the birds were singing too!. Pure bliss...and did i mention, a bird built her nest in the tree in front of the balcony so every morning, i get to see her sitting on her eggs.

Work has been interesting. I got to think of combinations of ties, shirts and jumpers/cardigans to wear for the past few days (not that I have many, even more the need to mix and match)..haha..on a serious note, I'm beginning to understand the responsibilties that come up with 'growing up'. And even more the role I potentially playing or if not already in someone else's well being. Most of my friends/colleagues knew that already when they were in uni and i somehow only realise it now..i can be a bit blur sometimes but oh well..

While I was enjoying my Angas beef at McD's, i saw this family that came in, and could tell that it was really a treat for the kids to have McD's. They were so cute in their raincoat and were all smiling so happily. And it came back to me again, the reminder of how blessed I am and how fortunate that I am to be in where I am in life. Even with all the complains that I pour out to Him, He still loves me and gives me more than what I need. How can I not be amazed by this Love. and He knows what makes me smile, what cheers me up when I'm down..He knows us more than we know ourselves..how can we not fall down and worship..

We have been blessed to bless others, one of my life principles..

2 Corinthians 5:14 For the love of Christ compels us...

and so dear reader, I thank you for taking the time to have an interest in my life and for stopping by here when you do and I hope you continue to do so, and I hope that these life stories that I have may be of some use to you.

Quick update

2009-08-25T21:19:00.002+09:30

seen on a letter (which I sneakily had a peek on) from the HR department to the pharmacy manager of the place I am working at with regards to my recent employment

'...we trust her (referring to me) addition to your team will be...'

and there were more reference to me as 'her/she' in the letter ! no wonder I didn't get a copy of the letter.

my goodness...memories of Convention 07 came flooding back in when I was categorised under 'F' and was slotted to share room with the ladies instead..

i may consider a name change if this continues..haha..

apart from that little hiccup, all's been well. I'm still smiling and am so grateful for the opportunity to even go to work.

A new beginning

2009-08-23T19:21:00.002+09:30

I will be starting work tomorrow as an intern pharmacist. Thank God !

man..why did I tell mummy not to iron my shirts when she was here...haha.

Thanks for praying and for all the encouragements.

August is the Farewell month of 2009

2009-08-19T16:10:00.002+09:30

Just realized that August is going to be an emotionally stretching one for me.

Family came and we had such a good time and it was hard to say bye bye when they left.

May came and we had such a good time too and just like that, she returned home already and I couldn't bring myself to go to the airport this time around.

And Esther's leaving this Saturday, so that's another bye bye.

I guess life still goes on and just another reminder to not take things for granted and to seize every moment.

Growing up

2009-08-14T17:47:00.002+09:30

And Dad's leaving this Sunday. That will end what was one of the most cherished 2 weeks of 2009 for me so far. And you can imagine, the bulk of our conversations were around the themes of growing up. Cars, stock market, investments, 5 - 10 yr goal plans and what all those things where you only hear 'grown ups' talk about. And of course, your typical family bickering. :)

'Uncle Wei Jin'...

haha. Time to grow up.

I guess there comes a point in time in life when you realised, 'Woah, i can't last as long as before on the jogging field' or when suddenly, you are interested in a company's performance in the stock market. I think I'm there right now.

God willing, I will be starting work soon. I am really excited about it but I realised also that ends a chapter in my life and the start of a new one. And the responsiblities that comes with it in one sense, excites me but also causes me to be a bit more cautious in my decisions and how I use my resources. I think also of the vast opportunities that are before me, of what I can do and experience and boy..i can't wait. And I realise how things change just like that. It was just like yesterday I was playing football kaki ayam in the house garden with my bro, being chased around by mum to not damage her pots and plants and now, i'm on the brink of starting work as a pharmacist intern.

Things change so fast and I would say, I sometimes fear change or take a long time to adapt and I always want to cling on to something which is 'safe' and 'stable'.

In the midst of all these, I am reminded of One who is unchangable, who is certain and who holds true to who He say He is. A friend just recent gave me a study on the Doctrine of the 'Evangelicals' and the first study was on the infallibilty and the inerrancy of the Word of God.

A portion from Scripture:

All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work.

Mum left a copy of this month's edition of Reader's Digest. This months special report was on Men's midlife survival guide. haha. And there was a page on quotes and I would like to share 2 with you which I thought was rather..amusing...and i guess a bit true...just a lil bit...haha.

In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man. If you want anything done, ask a woman.

-Margaret Thatcher-

In every real man a child is hidden that wants to play.

-Friedrich Nietzsche-

Woot!

2009-08-11T23:28:00.002+09:30

Thank You Lord :)

And there was 3

2009-08-09T20:20:00.004+09:30

And so for a week, 5 of us were together and we thank God for the time we had together, never had so much fun :)

Mum and Lyn left this morning, thought I wouldnt cry anymore..haha..

Dad's gonna be with us for an extra week..all the jantan wongs.

This will be interesting. I've gotta cook with less salt and all things unhealthy.

First dinner with the guys, steam beans, stir fry celery with kacang and ikan bilis and tauyu chicken

Picture updates 2

2009-08-03T15:44:00.007+09:30

My personal present for grad with angpau money from auntie. Have been eyeing this one for a bit and yes, definitely enjoying it

With the Lim brothers. Ming and Kai.

I am grateful for the many great things You have done and are doing and will do.

Thank You.

Pictures update

2009-08-02T22:10:00.006+09:30

Pumped

2009-07-30T15:27:00.002+09:30

In less than 48 hrs, the females from the Wong clan will be arriving and 24 hours later the Big Boss will be arriving..

am excited indeed. our place has never been cleaner :P

Graduation ceremony on the 5th of Aug.

.... finally.

Thank You

Operation Encounter 2009

2009-07-13T23:15:00.009+09:30

Over the past few months, i had the privillege of working alongside some tremendously gifted people planning for a seminar by Wycliffe Australia. It's called Operation Encounter, OE for short and its basically a seminar that teaches a lil bit on the 'how to' of cross-culture. It was from the 10-12 of July 2009 and I was looking after the logistic side of things and admin too. It wasn't something that i like fully enjoyed and had some difficulties at different point in time but i learnt to take each one of them as a challenge to overcome.

That gave me a change of perspective, from whining..to having fun. :) The experience was definitely something that i won't forget and the lessons learnt too was refreshing.

Just thought i leave some pictures here for your viewing pleasure.

Aileen Morrow shared about a mission trip to Phillipines next year and was giving out flyers and when I took one, I was...surprised. Guess who's on the front cover of the flyer?

Ms Lee Ee May.

And when i opened it, guess who i saw inside?

Me!!! haha.

Fyi, the picture was taken in OCF SA Ecamp 2007

I wonder whether i can ask for commission if ppl sign up for this mission trip. haha

So klg folks, if you are seeing this, hope you guys are proud..haha, we klg reps are accidental models on flyers being distributed around the Australian churches.

With Aileen and the OE 09 planning team

And i just had to put this, a pic of my latest investment. tight leggings to go jogging during winter..how sexy..haha

Mum, this is for you.

2009-06-28T14:15:00.006+09:30

Haha. yes, i know we owe you a picture of us wearing the same tee that u got us..but this will hv to do for now.. :)

taken after church at home.

and i just met another Wong Wei Jin, he has an english name, Nick, small little fella that runs around in church, ha..

Of attempts at emo pics and good food :)

2009-06-26T11:00:00.008+09:30

My attempt to put a lil bit more effort in decorating dinner.haha

Pictures are not in order. They are for the viewing pleasure of those back home. *hint* mum..thats u...haha..and credits to sherny for the solid reflection like photo..and to all of us in it who made a fool of ourselves posing..hehe..pure bliss :) i certainly had fun

Just had a good time with some students from the Bible College of South Australia. Some of them who were preparing for ministry wanted the opportunity to just speak to international students here in Adelaide, to cross culture and they got a few of us from OCF to meet up with them. They wanted to hear a little bit about our experiences specifically those of us who were also actively serving in leadership....and it was an interesting experience. I had a lightbulb moment.

I realised what a privillege position the Australian Church is in with the immense number of international student at their doorstep. It's global missions at their doorstep. By reaching out to just one person from a different country and investing him him/her, they can potentially change a country. This person would in time bring the gospel back to his/her own people. Imagine, the opportunity to change a nation at your doorstep. When you see it from that perspective, you can't help but just marvel at the opportunity at hand.

And that was how OCF was started. An Australian man used by God took in an international student to share a meal with. It went on to sharing the gospel with him, starting Bible studies, discipleship, biblical Christian fellowship and the student went on to bring his friends and voila, OCF was born and one can only imagine how many have been touched by God through OCF.

And this was just through one Australian man. Imagine what would happen if the Australian church as a whole adopted this as a pattern/strategy for global missions. For one, it would definitely save costs (hehe..yes, the cheapo in me thinking..as it won't require sending ppl out to nations). fuhh..this is just too overwhelming..i am excited.

But of course, it would really be a selfless sacrifice as they would be investing in things that they cannot 'see' and 'imagine'. But isn't that what God has called us to? to have faith and to invest in the unseen. And I believe that only God can cause a drastic impact of this magnitude.

Check out the lyrics of this song, God of Justice by Tim Hughes

God of Justice, Saviour to all
Came to rescue the weak and the poor
Chose to serve and not be served

Jesus, You have called us
Freely we've received
Now freely we will give

We must go live to feed the hungry
Stand beside the broken
We must go
Stepping forward keep us from just singing
Move us into action
We must go

To act justly everyday
Loving mercy in everyway
Walking humbly before You God

You have shown us, what You require
Freely we've received
Now freely we will give

Fill us up and send us out
Fill us up and send us out
Fill us up and send us out Lord

Maternal/Paternal instincts?

2009-06-18T14:22:00.003+09:30

It's been sunny the past few days. Thank God :)

Decided to take the free bus down to central market today, haven't done it in awhile already. And also, needed to buy stuffs to cook for bro whos got papers starting this monday. I always find it refreshing to walk through the markets here, especially during off peak hours when there are not so many people. It can get pretty interesting as you can imagine, pushing and shoving and fighting with fellow international students for cheap bargains and old aunties too..hehe.

And so yea, enjoyed the whole walking and thinking of what to cook and getting the necesary ingredients. And i want to say this, for all those who are in Adelaide and like me, adores the A1 curry paste, it's cheaper in Thuan Phat. I usually buy mine from Kim Wang for Aud 2.25 and i bought 2 packets there today. All this while, i was under the assumption that you can only get it from there.

I headed to Thuan Phat to look for other stuffs and lo and behold, i found the A1 curry paste there too...... for Aud 2.15!!!!! A whole 10 cents cheapers. I felt so conned..haha. Some may say, it's only 10 cents but if you like us buy it quite often just bcoz its da bomb!!!and we miss our curries back home..you can actually save a bit..

on the way back on the bus, i saw this family got on the bus. the small lil boy just walked up straight to the driver and gave him a big hug to wish him good morning..and i couldnt help but smilleeeee and went all warm and fuzzy inside..haha..i feel so gay now..

and thats when it hit me ..shoot, am i becoming domesticated? going all fuzzy when i see cute lil children hugging old uncle bus drivers, going all crazy when im cheated 10 cents?thinking of what to cook?....my mum doest that..not me..hahaha...

which reminded me again of my conversation with a dear brother yesterday during our hike up to Mt Lofty...some guys today have lost that masculine heart, if i can call it that..but i've also learnt that some of us actually expresses it differently..then it hit me, maybe not all of us jantans have gone sissified..but we just express it differently than our 'forefathers' due to the shift of times...theres still hope for us, fellow warriors of God :)

I end here with a quote from John Stotts' Contemporary Christianity (was reading it on the bus),

'The only way to understand the disappointments and frustrations of life, the loneliness, the suffering and the pain, is to see them as part of our loving Father's discipline in his determination to make us like Christ.'

Hebrews 12:4-11

Mountain of death..conquered

2009-06-16T17:51:00.003+09:30

hahahahah...for those who are familiar with Adelaide..there's this slope on Montefiore Rd which i used to go joggin on.before the op, personal best was 4 rounds up and down..dare not try it since the op..always had this fear of pain..but today...muahahahahaha..

yup..after a long time, succeeded in going up but dare not come down la..but still, that's a milestone for me.

did about 6k's plus on hard terrain, a mix of flat land and slopes...longest that i've pushed the knees to. will try to hit 10 soon.

Hope

2009-06-13T23:04:00.006+09:30

Highlights of the week: . . . .(or at least some of it) . . . had other interesting stuffs happening too :)

Received a card from a fellow sister from Open doors, i have never met her but it was just nice to receive a word of encouragement during this period of waiting.

A close brother decided to give me some of his 'economist' magazines and here am i, learning to be more aware of what's happening on a global scale. Not easy reads..but nevertheless, enjoying the learning.

And of course...wacky phone calls from back home..she actually sang me a song together with her 2 accomplices (even had a guitar to back her up)..

Songs which has encouraged me and i hope that it does for you too..

All the Way My Savior Leads Me (A cover of the hymn)

By Chris Tomlin

All the way my savior leads me

Who have I to ask beside

How could I doubt His tender mercy

Who through life has been my guide

All the way my savior leads me

He cheers each winding path I tread

He gives me grace for every trial

Feeds me with the living breath

You lead me,

You keep me from falling

You carry me close to Your heart

And surely your goodness and mercy

Will follow me

All the way my savior leads me

All the fullness of His love

All the sureness of His promise

In the triumph of His blood

And when my spirit clothed immortal

Wings its flight to realms of day

This my song through endless ages

Jesus led me all the way

Yang terutama di dalam hidup ini
Meninggikan nama Yesus
Yang terutama di dalam hidup ini
Memuliakan namaNya

Haleluya, Haleluya
Saya mau cinta Yesus
Haleluya, Haleluya
Saya mau cinta Yesus

Tuhan adalah kekuatanku

Bersama Dia ku tak akan goyang

Ku 'kan terbang tinggi bagai rajawali

Melakukan perbuatan yang besar

Ku 'kan terbang tinggi bagai rajawali

Dan melayang tinggi dalam kemuliaanNya

Biar bumi bergoncang dan badai menerpa

Ku 'kan terbang tinggi bersama Dia

Thank You for that Word of encouragement

On a different note, have just finished the book I bought by Tozer on worship and found it to be refreshing, learnt something from him which i'm 'trying'. He writes about how he sometimes just go to a corner with a Bible and a hymn book and seeks Him. He really waits for the Holy Spirit to come, sometimes hours. And of course, we all know that when the Holy Spirit comes, things happen. And so, i sorta thought..hmm..i worship the same God as Tozer, why can't i have the same experience or even more (check out John 14:12)..and so, i decided to practise waiting upon Him daily, and man...when the Holy Spirit comes..well..words are just not sufficient. One of the days, i just took my guitar and flipped open my Bible and just started singing the Psalms and interestingly, i can't remember the melodies of it. I believe that at that point in time, it was a natural response to Him and things like this can't be 'created' or repeated.

One of the things that i have been thinking, in terms of Christian living, is that why so many believers live such defeated dark cold lives and i've come to think at least for now (in my life experience) is that they have not encountered God. Moses encountered God and his face shone like crazy, Paul encountered God and he was changed..there would be a change when we encounter God, and i believe we will not have to then 'try' to be a child of God, we will automatically just be one.

Last night at OCF was amazing and i thank Him for all that He did and for what He said.

Matthew 5:8 Blessed are the pure in heart, For they shall see God.

Let us then now 'work' on purifying our hearts. Yes, God purifies but we need to allow Him to. Tozer again writes about this analogy about us having a spiritual vacuum that only God can fill. A vacuum is a volume of space that is essentially empty of all matter, such that its gaseous pressure is much less than atmospheric pressure (Wikipedia). When a container containing vacuum is exposed, the outside forces gush in to equilibrate (make equal) the internal and external environment and likewise, all we need is to ask God to remove the sins that is blocking Him from filling us and once that is removed, the Holy Spirit just rushes in.

Random thought, why do we then sing 'open the eyes of my heart, i want to see You?' we should be singing 'purify my heart, i want to see You' :)

22nd Birthday pics

2009-06-08T23:19:00.004+09:30

See ya Handsome

2009-06-05T15:32:00.002+09:30

Most precious buddy is leaving for a long holiday.

See you soon.

love always.

Thank You L

2009-06-04T10:13:00.003+09:30

Had a very interesting night last night. L invited me for a dinner organized by the CMS (Church Missionray Society) of Australia. He went thinking it was just going to be a smallish dinner kinda thing with some sharing by some missionaries whilst I went just thinking, i'm a bit free now, why not just go and listen.

To our surprise, when we got there, there were balloons everywhere, nice lights and some people in jackets and coats and the works. And there was so many people. The emcee welcomed us to their version of the Logies Awards dinner (Australia's version of the Oscars). So yea..we had a rather interesting time. :p

The food was great and the company was even better. Met some new people, saw some familiar faces from Evangelical Students and a gathering by Wycliffe i attended once. But I was just awed by the fact that I was in the presence of fellow brothers and sisters in Christ, people whom I have never met and yet, we're family. I'm sure the majority of them were like church leaders/elders etc.

The theme of the night was 'reaching the unreachable' and as the night went on, well, I was just awed again at how God dosen't need us to champion His Cause. Listening to countless testimonies, I was just, 'Wow, You don't need me but yet, You invite me to follow You as You do Your work amongst us.' In one of the prayers, someone prayed, 'Thank You for allowing us to be part of Your Mission for the World.'..or along those lines

'What is Your purpose for me in all this?' hmmm.....

It can be rather intimidating at times, and scary too. But all we need is to simply trust and obey.

On the way back, i randomly grabbed 2 books just for more info and i just only had the time to read through them. One of them was called, 'Making a difference that lasts-a guide to preparing your Will'. What a book to take back from a nice evening dinner.

I was 'accused' once of being paranoid about death. While growing up, I always displayed fear of death. Like what if while travelling up to Cameron Highlands (a hill in Malaysia), there would be a land slide and we would all die kinda thing. It wasn't due to some incident or anything but i used to have terrible nightmares about death when I was 9ish, but that's another story.

Anyways, a fellow brother also sent me a link about someone going through her last few stages in cancer and not being afraid of death. Go have a look, i was encouraged from her testimony.

http://deathisnotdying.com/

My head knowledge tells me that I have nothing to be afraid of death because of Jesus but my insticts still does not express it.

But yea, the whole point in this was just to remind myself of what is important and what isn't.

Please pray for mum and sis, they're leaving on a mission trip today.

Look

2009-05-29T13:03:00.002+09:30

My latest addition..a gift from Danny, Justin and Bryan. This is definitely going to be one interesting read.

I probably need to counsel myself first..haha

twisted ankle yesterday and don't have full range now but i don't think it's anything serious..i hope.

Curry in Proverbs?

2009-05-28T16:13:00.002+09:30

Was just flipping through the book of Proverbs and at the corner of my eye, i thought i saw, 'curry flavour'. But on a second read, i realised i was just thinking too much about food. (we're cooking lamb curry tonight..hehe)

Proverbs 19.6 Many curry favor with a ruler, and everyone is the friend of a man who gives gifts.

NIV

The NKJV says, 'Many entreat the favor of the nobility, And every man is a friend to one who gives gifts.'

Go figure..

Interestingly when typing this post, i actually thought the verse was in 16.9 and when i opened my Bible just to confirm again, 16.9 read 'In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps.' (i've come to experienced myself that God actually still speaks through very real and practical ways and sometimes we're just so ignorant of it that we allow it to just zip past our minds)

Truth be told, i am very much afraid of where I am in life right now. I'm still waiting for that 'illusive job' and it just dawned upon me that applying for PR is actually a BIG decision and it's not something that I should do just because. The past few weeks of my life has been more of like a mini holiday filled with house chores. Seeing that I'm the free-er hsemate at this point in time, i try my best to do more of the chores and help around where I can. Apart from that, my time have been filled with sending out resumes, calling up pharmacies, checking out Bible colleges and reading books. Just recently finished a book on a missionary who sorta did like a 'Jim Elliot' thing and went to South America. Title of the book is 'Bruchko'

I finally took that leap of faith to start reading Contemporary Christianity by John Stott. It's not for the faint hearted. But yes, what he writes about has certainly been challenging and refrehing. After this, i hope to start on my new additions, Getting the best from the Bible by Selwyn Hughes and The Worship-Driven Life by Tozer. And before you think, i'm some holy-moly fella who just reads Christian books only, let me say something. I really want to challenge what I already know, just to make sure that what I know is true and reading is certainly something which i see can aid that. I one day want to invest in books which are on secular issues too but looking at where I am right now, not having a job and living on limited finances, i rather invest first on books which I know have value. Not to say that secular books have no value but i feel a bit safe-r in sacrificing my lunch money on Christian books because i know i can pass them around and it can certainly be a blessing to someone. So currently, my only source of secular issues are free reads at the book shops or websites. :) yes yes cheapo klg fella.

Some days I wake up not knowing what I'm doing and whether am I going in the right direction in life, the direction that He intended for me. The urge to go back is still very strong in me but i think a major pulling factor is the desire to go back to what is familiar and comfortable and I think that is not a good enough reason to go back. Sure I have a heart for my fellow bangsawan and church back home but i think right now, the desire to go back to what is comfortable and familiar is a big thing and I don't believe that is what He wants for me now.

Sometimes when i'm not doing anything, I allow my mind to wander and to have dreams and I believe that there may be something more than just going back to Negaraku...or could it be just my innate male desire to do 'big' things. hmm...time will tell. But i see this season in Adelaide being a preparation one. The past 2 years and so has certainly been filled with lessons and i've learnt lots. I would love to go to Bible college one day, to challenge my thoughts/opinions too and hence, all the readings now also. Right now, i'm enrolled in Wei Jin's college where I can dictate my pace of learning..haha. The background of church where i grew up dosen't really like fully encourage people to go to Bible college and that's why we were thought how to read/study the Bible for ourselves but I would love to go there one day just to see/hear what others think. But ya, we'll see where God leads.

Wow, just realised i wrote quite a bit..hehe. can be very cheong hei sometimes but i won't apologize for that coz this is where i sometimes come to just pour out my thoughts.

The song, 'Your grace is enough' rings in my ears and i pray and hope that during this time of uncertainty, when my worldly desires can so easily overtake my desire for Him, that those words will remain true with me.

Time to go exercise that almost-there knee of mine.

Thank you

2009-05-24T00:55:00.002+09:30

Before I go to bed tonight, I just want to say a big Thank You to every single one of you out there who made the day extra special for me. The 'sabos', surprises, sms', calls, fb messages (i nv spent so much time on fb before-attempted to thank everyone, sorry if i missed you, but yes, thank u), letters, cards, gifts, cookies, cakes, hot chocolate, coffee, tong shui, food, TIME sacrificed to just chill out with me from SA, interstate and international.

Thank You.

Lest you think I am boastful, I really just want to say thank You because it made a difference for me. I was hoping that the family would turn up at the door step (was hoping to celebrate with them after awhile of not being able to), but yea, i thank God for my 'extended family' here.

It was timely too.

We looked at the crucifixion story at OCF on the Friday before and I was again reminded the Greatest Gift that I could ever received.

Thank You.

Woohoo

2009-05-12T13:15:00.002+09:30

I found my answer to my previous post on when was Paul's another encounter with Jesus. Thank you to a certain friend :)

but yes, i cheated and resorted to asking around. Got lazy after going through his letters again and it never occur to me that it would be in somewhere else.

This mini quest on Paul's life that i went on has just revealed to me what a man he is. I mean, I always believed that he's one of a kind and that was just because from the fact that the Holy Spirit used him to write quite a number of the books in the NT in the form of his letters. But this mini quest which i have just completed (hehehe...oh the joy!!!) has just brought that to a whole new level. I think we should not take lightly when reading his writings..even Peter found it hard to understand his writings (cf 2 Peter 3: 15-16) and even more so because its the divine Word of God.

An interesting sermon.

2009-05-12T12:07:00.002+09:30

Glorification: Conformed to Christ for the Supremacy of Christ

Listen | Download | Podcast

By John PiperAugust 11, 2002

Romans 8:28-30

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. ²⁹For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son, so that He would be the firstborn among many brethren;³⁰and these whom He predestined, He also called; and these whom He called, He also justified; and these whom He justified, He also glorified.

Ponder with me one of the implications of the "for" ("because") at the beginning of verse 29. This word means that verse 29 and the following verses are a support, or an argument, or a foundation, or ground, or basis for the promise in verse 28. In other words, Paul writes verse 29 so that you will be more confident in the promise of verse 28. I promise you, God says, that all the hard things in your life will work together for your good, because I foreknew you and predestined you and called you and justified you and glorified you. So be strong and take risks and go to the hard places of need and show the world by your love that you trust God and his promises more than wealth or weapons of police or alarm systems or good neighborhoods or available medical care.

Why Are There Arguments and Not Just Raw Authority?

But here's the question: If God never lies, and if he promises in verse 28 that everything will work together for our good, then how is our faith in this promise made any stronger by a ground in verses 29-30? I mean, God has spoken in verse 28 and God is God, and his word is infallible and unbreakable. Shouldn't we just believe it because he said it? Why does Paul give arguments? How do arguments for something God has said make our confidence stronger?

Before I try to answer that question, be sure you see the significance of it. It's really a question of why we have the kind of Bible we do. God could have given us a list of affirmations about his nature and his character and a list of commandments to do. It certainly would have been a lot shorter. But instead he gave us (for example in Romans) long, complex arguments and explanations and reasonings. In the gospels he gave us narrative of Jesus' deeds and collections of Jesus' teachings and provocative groups of parables. In the Old Testament he gave us sweeping overviews of Israel's history and accounts of the origin of the world, and glimpses into the inner lives of psalmists and powerful visions and sermons of the prophets and collections of proverbs.

What's the point of all this lavish special revelation of the ways of God in the world? That's the question we are really asking when we ask, "Why does Paul buttress Romans 8:28 with an argument in verses 29-30?" Why not just tell us what God promises to do for us and count on faith to be strong in holding to the promise?

Faith Is a Response to the Revelation of Light

The answer — at least a very important part of the answer — is that faith is not a leap in the dark, but a response to the revelation of light. If faith were grounded on nothing more than raw authority, then the Bible would not have been written the way it is, and the history of redemption would not have been planned the way it was. Faith is not based merely on raw authority (like: "God said verse 28 so believe it. Period! No basis needed! No arguments required!"). Faith is not a response to raw authority; faith is a response to the revelation of light. Not physical light, but spiritual light.

Let's turn to 2 Corinthians 4:4-6 to see this and to launch us further into our text today. What Paul says in these verses is that the gospel of Christ is the revelation of this spiritual light. He calls it two things, one in verse 4 and another in verse 6. Verse 4: "The god of this world (I think that is Satan) has blinded the minds of the unbelieving so that they might not see (!) the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God." So there is "seeing" necessary for salvation. When Paul says in 2 Corinthians 5:7, "We walk by faith and not by sight," he means physical sight, not this spiritual sight in 2 Corinthians 4:4. The light we must see to be saved is the "light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God."

When the gospel is preached we must see Christ in it asglorious, indeed, as the image of God himself. This is why the four gospels, for example, are not one-sentence books: "Christ is glorious and Christ is God." True! But faith in this Christ is NOT a response of raw authority or a leap in the dark. It is a response to the light of glory in the person and work of Christ. Therefore the person and work of Christ are lavishly displayed in four gospels and Acts and epistles and Revelation.

This is why Paul says in verse 5, "For we do not preach ourselves but Christ Jesus as Lord, and ourselves as your bond-servants for Jesus' sake." Preaching ourselves would not help you see Christ. Preaching Christ as Lord and putting ourselves in the lowly position of slaves, that's what will help you see the glory of Christ so that you have sure foundation under your faith.

Then in verse 6 he describes in a different way this same spiritual light of verse 4. He says, "For God, who said, "Light shall shine out of darkness,' is the One who has shone in our hearts to givethe Light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ." This is the same reality as the light in verse 4, but with different words. According to verse 4 we must see "the glory of Christ, who is the image of God." And according to verse 6 we must see "the glory of God in the face of Christ." The "glory of God" is the "glory of Christ," and the "image of God" is in "the face of Christ" — which I take to mean the portrait of his whole being — his character, his nature, his person.

Here's the point: faith is not a leap in the dark. There is light all over these verses. Faith is a response to the light of God's revelation of himself in Christ in history, especially in the gospel. Therefore, to help people come to faith, and to sustain and strengthen our own faith, we need to know (notice the word "knowledge" in verse 26, "light of the knowledge of the glory of God") — we need to know the way Christ acted, what he did, what he said, how he thought, how he spoke, how he suffered, and how all this was working out the plans of God. This is the way the glory of Christ shines out for us to see. And this seeing is the way faith comes into being and the way it is sustained and strengthened.

The Connection with Romans 8:29

Now here's the connection with Romans 8:29. Paul wants us to have faith in the promise of Romans 8:28 — that God will work all things for your good — so that we will be radical, risk-taking, loving, sacrificial, Christians with a wartime mentality. But he knows that faith is based not on raw authority of mere statements. It rises in response to the revelation of God's glory. This is why he does what he does in verses 29-30, he shows us some of the ways of God. He gives us a spectacular glimpse into the sovereign, saving work of God from eternity to eternity — from the foreknowing-foreloving-forechoosing of eternity past, to the final glorifying of his people in eternity future. Seeing the glorious work of God in Christ in verses 29 is not just incidental information; it is the revelation of who God is, how God acts, how God loves and saves and keeps. The point of it is to display the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in Christ. And to make our faith in the promise of Romans 8:28 something it could never be without it. So rivet your gaze on the glory of God in the acts of Romans 8:29-30.

Now there are two more questions about this revelation in verses 29-30 that I want to deal with this morning before we move ahead into verses 31ff next week. One is this: Why is "sanctification" not mentioned in the chain that leads from foreknowledge to glorification? And the other is: Why does Paul say (in verse 29) that the aim of our predestination is not merely to be conformed to the image of God's Son, but it is "so that He would be the firstborn among many brethren"?

Why Is Sanctification Not Mentioned in the Chain?

First, where is "sanctification" in the chain of these verses? You recall what "sanctification" is. It was the theme of chapter six. Remember verse 22: "But now having been freed from sin and enslaved to God, you derive your benefit, resulting insanctification, and the outcome, eternal life." So sanctification is the gradual process of our becoming holy which leads to eternal life.

Why is it not mentioned in this unbreakable chain in Romans 8:29-30? Paul mentions five links in the chain: Those whom he (1)foreknew he predestined; and those whom he (2) predestined he called; and those whom he (3) called, he justified; and those whom he (4) justified, he (5) glorified. Why didn't he say, "And those whom he justified he sanctified, and those whom he sanctified he glorified"?

The reason this matters is that someone might say, "Well, since it's not in the chain, it's either not necessary for heaven like the others, or it is not the work of God the way the others are. Both of those inferences would be a deadly mistake. Sanctification is necessary for heaven. That is why Romans 6:22 says that the outcome of your sanctification is eternal life! (See Hebrews 12:14; Galatians 5:21; 1 Corinthians 6:9). And that makes it all the more important that it is indeed God's work in us, so that the necessity of it doesn't throw us back on ourselves. It throws us desperately on God.

For example, Paul says in Philippians 1:6, "For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus." And Philippians 2:12b-13, "Work out your salvation with fear and trembling; for it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure." And 1 Corinthians 15:10, "But by the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace toward me did not prove vain; but I labored even more than all of them, yet not I, but the grace of God with me."

So sanctification is both necessary and the work of God. So why is it not mentioned between justification and glorification. I think the reason is that in Paul's mind sanctification is included in glorification. So, in effect, he does make it part of the chain. Now why do I think this? What's the Biblical basis for it?

It comes from 2 Corinthians 3:18. Paul describes here how we are changed into the likeness of Christ — that is how we are sanctified. It happens by looking to Christ — the spiritual sight we talked about earlier (note the context!). He says, "But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit."

Now what is so relevant in this verse for us is the word "glory." Our gradual change into the image of Christ is, Paul says, a moving "from glory to glory." And he says this is from the Lord. This is essentially the work of the Lord. So being glorified in Paul's mind is not only the final transformation at the end of the age at the resurrection when we get out new bodies; it is also the process of moving morally and spiritually toward that goal.

So in Paul's mind, when he said in Romans 8:30, "the justified are glorified" he meant, God works to make sure that those whom he justified move from one degree of glory to the next (sanctification) and finally reach perfection with new and glorious bodies like Christ's (Hebrews 12:23; Philippians 3:21). So your progressive sanctification — your becoming like Jesus — is as sure and as firmly planned and worked by God as is your election and predestination and calling and justification and final glory.

Why Is the Goal That Christ Would Be "Firstborn Among Many Brethren"?

Which leads naturally to the last question: Clearly verse 29 says that the aim of our predestination is our likeness to Christ. So sanctification is here in verse 29 as well. "Those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son." So your holiness, your sanctification, your becoming like Jesus is God's aim for your life from eternity. Predestination means: Predestined to become like Jesus. That is what you should be giving yourself to. Pray and study and fight and suffer and trust to be like Jesus.

Now my question is, Why does Paul go on to say, ". . . so that He would be the firstborn among many brethren." Colossians 1:18 gives the answer: "He is the beginning, the firstborn (same word as in Romans 8:29, prwto,tokon) from the dead, so that He Himself will come to have first place in everything." Christ died and rose from the dead as the firstborn of many siblings so that he would be seen and enjoyed by them and by others as preeminent, superior, gloriously great.

In other words, our destiny to be like Christ is all about being prepared to see and savor his superiority. We must have his character and likeness to know him and see him and love him and admire him and make much of him. By adding the words, "that He would be the firstborn among many brethren," Paul makes plain that Christ is ever and always supreme above us,and that we must be holy in order to be with him and enjoy him forever.

Test Yourself

Without these final words in verse 29, O how easily we would slip into a man-centered view of sanctification that make us and our likeness to Christ the ultimate goal. It is a goal. But it is not the ultimate goal. The exaltation of Christ is the ultimate goal. So consider some questions to test yourself as we close. Are pursuing your own glory or Christ's? Take some attributes of Christ that we might pursue.

Do I want to be strong like Christ, so I will be admired as strong, or so that I can defeat every adversary that would entice me to settle for any pleasure less than admiring the strongest person in the universe, Christ?
Do I want to be wise like Christ, so I will be admired as wise and intelligent, or so that I can discern and admire the One who is most truly and all-satisfyingly wise?
Do I want to be holy like Christ, so that I can be admired as holy, or so that I can be free from all unholy inhibitions that keep me from seeing and savoring the holiness of Christ?
Do I want to be loving like Christ, so I will be admired as a loving person, or so that I will enjoy extending to others, even in sufferings, the all-satisfying love of Christ?

Everything in these verses — all of God's work, his choosing you, predestining you, calling you, justifying you, sanctifying you, bringing you to final glory — is designed by God not mainly to make much of us, but to free us and fit us to enjoy making much of Christ forever.

So I plead with you: Set your mind's attention and your heart's affection on the glory of Christ so that you will be changed from glory to glory into his image, so that you might fully enjoy what you were made for — making much of Christ.

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Please include the following statement on any distributed copy: By John Piper. © Desiring God. Website: desiringGod.org

Joy in waiting

2009-05-10T22:10:00.002+09:30

I am officially a pharmacy graduate....aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa....................... Thank God. What a relief. Convo's on the 5th of Aug.

Now that one part of this journey is completed, it's time to prepare for the next one :)

Happy Mother's Day Mummy, we will take that picture of the both of us with that t's u got us soon enough and post it up here or something..hehe

aaaaaa.....man, i still can't believe it...feels kinda surreal actually.

after all the ups and downs. im reminded that again that He is faithful..even when we are not.

I want to say thank you to all those who have been such a huge encouragement to me the past few years and also for praying for me.

2 Timothy 2:13 (New International Version)

¹³if we are faithless,
he will remain faithful,
for he cannot disown himself.

*jumps around like a crazy fella*

Thank You, Lord

and by the way, quick trivia, i was told today that Jesus met Paul more than once and im trying to find it in the Bible. any ideas anyone?

Culinary discoveries

2009-05-08T12:55:00.003+09:30

Not sure about you but i was always told by mum that all these instant noodles that we eat and adore has a layer of plastic coating them. Just recently i heard that again from a guy i just met (his mum was part of the team that discovered indo mi back in indonesia) and he said that yea, its true. And apparently to get indo mi, you just invert the main compound of rat poison.

side note: that's another thing that's related to rat poison already. I learnt that Warfarin, a blood thinning drug used commonly in post stroke patients is also closely related to rat poison chemically. chemistry can be scary..i rather sometimes not know these things..

He told me that the leftover water used to boil the noodles can actually solidify and there's a technique to boil the noodles to get rid of the plastic layering. That got me interested. Last Friday, i ate 2 packets of indo mi and kept the water used to boil the noodles.

After one week, well..the pictures above speak for itself.

The water turned all gooey and smelly and clumps of yucky stuffs formed at the sides. There were some clumpy stuffs floating around and although it didn't fully solidify (could be the cold weather we're having, it's autumn already here), it did spook me enough. I don't think i will be eating instant noodles for a looooonnnnngggg time already if ever.

So yea, give it a go if you are interested. Be warned, you may not have the same affection for indo mi/cintan/maggi me anymore as i have come to experienced.

Just had my first experience in scaling a fish. It brought back memories of scrolling through the pasar malam back home. Everything smelt so fishy. Next time i'm home sick, i'm gonna go scale a fish and think about the fish monger at the Melawis pasar malam chopping fishes for us.

My heart rate increases and i just get so excited when i hear of these things

2009-05-07T10:57:00.003+09:30

Radiance - May 3, 2009 from Newsong Media on Vimeo.

A sermon by Ps Jaeson Ma

Psalm 143

2009-05-07T10:29:00.002+09:30

Bible reading for this morning

Psalm 143

A Psalm of David.

¹ Hear my prayer, O LORD,
         Give ear to my supplications!
         In Your faithfulness answer me,
         And in Your righteousness.
² Do not enter into judgment with Your servant,
         For in Your sight no one living is righteous.

³ For the enemy has persecuted my soul;
         He has crushed my life to the ground;
         He has made me dwell in darkness,
         Like those who have long been dead.
⁴ Therefore my spirit is overwhelmed within me;
         My heart within me is distressed.

⁵ I remember the days of old;
         I meditate on all Your works;
         I muse on the work of Your hands.
⁶ I spread out my hands to You;
         My soul longs for You like a thirsty land.  Selah

⁷ Answer me speedily, O LORD;
         My spirit fails!
         Do not hide Your face from me,
         Lest I be like those who go down into the pit.
⁸ Cause me to hear Your lovingkindness in the morning,
         For in You do I trust;
         Cause me to know the way in which I should walk,
         For I lift up my soul to You.

⁹ Deliver me, O LORD, from my enemies;
         In You I take shelter.^{a]" style="font-size: 0.75em; line-height: 0.5em; ">[a]}
¹⁰ Teach me to do Your will,
         For You are my God;
         Your Spirit is good.
         Lead me in the land of uprightness.

¹¹ Revive me, O LORD, for Your name’s sake!
         For Your righteousness’ sake bring my soul out of trouble.
¹² In Your mercy cut off my enemies,
         And destroy all those who afflict my soul;
         For I am Your servant.

In preparation for Bible study at OCF for this week, we were looking at the book of John 15 and particularly verse 14 stood out for me. 'You are my friends if you do what I command.' Isn't that odd as servants do what the Master commands, why would Jesus call those who do His command, friends. He later goes on to talk about how we are not servants anymore but His friends and also about loving each other. And that it clicked, our love to Him should be one where we choose to surrender ourselves to Him, giving ownership of our lives back to Him, acknowledging that He is Lord and our relationship with Him moves from a friendship one to a Lord-Servant one but we do it willingly realising that God and only Him knows whats best for us because He created us. We deliberately give ourselves back to Him.

Psalm 143:12 'For I am Your servant'

What a day

2009-05-02T21:27:00.004+09:30

Woke up and headed of to some careers expo today. Had to pay 5bucks to get in. But oh well, it was good fun. Didn't get much directions though but came back with more options. I can't wait to see what transpires over the next few weeks.

On an impulse move, we went down to Mt Lofty and climbed it and i can honestly say, it is definitely one of the harder climbs. Took about 3 hours to go down and back up (we drove to the summit and left the car there and climbed down first then back up), including the breaks and the times when we stopped to take pictures. It was definitely a refreshing time for us, just spending time sharing things on our hearts.

There were times when we were just so tired we started singing songs/hymns and it was just wonderful to have one another. I thank God for the people that He has placed around me. It definitely makes a difference when we can encourage one another in this journey of faith.

Marley and Me

2009-04-28T10:49:00.000+09:30

If there's one movie which has made me cried the most, it's this one.

Updates

2009-04-24T12:06:00.012+09:30

The pictures are not in order, just randomly dumped them all. Went to Vic for the weekend to visit the OCF centres there and the leaders too and it was an enriching one and i really thank God for that although i came back with fever and a throat infection (some ppl are claiming that its post-melb blues and im missing melb already..haha)

Came back and realised too that it was time we did something about the stack of dried leaves in the car port. We've been procastinating in cleaning them up but yea, finally realised that we better clear them up before it starts raining making them more 'annoying'. And so, the brother and i set out to clean them up and i realised that hey, its something that we probably wont get to do in Malaysia. And instead of clearing up snow, we're removing stack loads of dried leaves. In one of the pictures above, you would've noticed how our pagola thingy is like almost naked...so yea, you can imagine how much leaves we collected.

and yes, it has been raining the past few days, feels like we're back under tropical weather..oh, such joy.. :)

Received a book as a gift the other day and i'm really drawn to it. Its a shepherds perspective on Psalm 23. I'm currently also reading Wild at Heart again. ..to see what i missed last time.

Food for thought

2009-04-08T16:00:00.001+09:30

Adapted from Tim Hughes' blog at worshipcentral.org

Qualities of a leader

Sir Alex Ferguson is arguably one of footballs greatest managers, winning more trophies than any other manager in the history of the English game with Manchester United. On a plane out to the States, I was reading an interview with Ferguson where he was asked about the 3 most important qualities of a leader. He responded saying the 3 keys were...
1. Control
2. Managing change
3. Observation
I was really interested in these. There's lots to learn here.

1. Control - how are we leading, inspiring and developing our teams? Are we clear in the way we lead, in the authority entrusted to us? Team dynamics can go horribly wrong when there is no clear leadership.

2. Managing change - how do we keep growing teams, raising up leaders, pushing on in to new things? Any leader that settles is in real trouble. To keep at the top of your game you need to manage change and allow new ideas to flourish.

3. Observation - attention to detail is so vital. Keeping a close watch on what's going on all around, listening closely to what others are saying and acting wisely on it is always essential to great leadership. There are no short cuts here - leadership involves hard work and a constant watch on all that's going on.

OCF South Australia's first meeting for the year 09...and my first time playing guitar with Sherny

2009-03-28T14:40:00.006+10:30

And yes, it was a historical moment. Not only was it OCF SA's first meeting for 2009 (thank God for the many who came, i think we hit 150 or maybe slightly less), but it was my first time playing the guitar with Wei Shern (yes, he is taller than me) for worship and it was something which i won't forget for a long time.

...althought the guitar went out of tune a bit suddenly, and i played the wrong chord somewhere...and maybe might have overstrummed a bit for some parts...ok..a lot...haha...but

nevertheless, it was a wonderful experience.

I grew up doing more of the leading worship part and not really playing any musical instrument. Only when in Adelaide did I start seriously exploring playing the guitar for worship as something that i can serve God with...and it really has been a humbling experience. Like how important it is to listen to one another (each other's musical instruments to make sure that all is in sync and not to overpower one another), how important it is to humbly submit to authority and to follow the leader (worship leader in this case) and how to make sure that God is reigning in our hearts and to allow the Holy Spirit to work through us as I've come to discover also how our playing the instrument can actually be an expression of the work of the Spirit or whether we allow Him to use us. .

Thanks to Woei Shyang for the pics.

currently reading up on how pain is managed in Parkinson's disease..ish ish

somehow i cant seem to get spaces btw the paragraphs. i apologize for the messy look.

The Call to prayer

2009-03-23T17:51:00.002+10:30

Would you join me to pray for the country of Malaysia for the next 2 weeks. A transition of leadership from one individual to another is said to happen. Much has been talked about it but I trust in His Sovereign will.

Reading news of how the global economy is worsening and its implications on the country of Malaysia, the necessity for strong and stable leadership has never been greater.

On a separate note, there has been a change in leadership in Madagascar.

2 Chronicles 7:14

if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land.

Updates

2009-03-14T22:59:00.003+10:30

Currently icing the knee watching 'The Guardian' on tele. So inspiring. :) I hope to have the same attitude as the US Marines Coast guard tag line 'so others may live'.

Just an update to say that i can finally receive mms'. So to all ya'all out there who relies on free mms', yup, i can start receiving em. Must've been pretty annoying to always receive replies from me saying that, 'oopss, sorry, i can't read your mms'.

I was just reading the local newspaper today and found out the most interesting piece of news today. In spite of the recent economic downturn, there is an increase in the number of international students in Adelaide. It was a whopping 26, 000 last year but this year, it has increased to a massive 30, 000, injecting about $740 million into the state's economy. One third of them are from Mainland China, 5000 from India and about 2200 from Malaysia and the remaining from other countries. There is an annual increase of 29.2% of international students studying in Adelaide, 4.4% ahead of the national average.

Just looking at things from the outside, i belong to a generation where our parents made sacrifces or wise economical decisions to ensure that their children will be able to continue their education in a foreign land. It's not only a Malaysian-thing, clearly, it's across different cultures and nationalities. We definitely have a lot to be grateful for.

On a personal note, just finished reading 'Piercing the darkness' by Frank E. Perretti. Definitely gave me a different perspective on spiritual warfare. Might start 'Contemporary Christianity' by John Stott soon. Been on a reading spree. Some of the books that i have just recently finished,

'Dangerous Act of Worship' by Mark Labberton, 'Postcards on a Journey' by John Mallison, 'A hitch-hikers guide to missions' by Ada Lum and not to forget, 'Grand weaver' by Ravi Zacharias.

Had the most intense kau kau com meeting thus far this afternoon. Definitely looking forward to more.

The dash

2009-03-06T14:31:00.001+10:30

Stumbled upon this the other day.

The Dash
copyright 1996 Linda Ellis

I read of a man who stood to speak at the funeral of a friend.
He referred to the dates on her tombstonefrom the beginning...to the end.
He noted that first came the date of her birthand spoke of the following date with tears,
but he said what mattered most of all was the dash between those years.
For that dash represents all the timethat she spent alive on earth...
and now only those who loved her know what that little line is worth.
For it matters not, how much we own;the cars....the house...the cash.
What matters is how we live and love and how we spend our dash.
So think about this long and hard...are there things you'd like to change?
For you never know how much time is left that can still be rearranged.
If we could just slow down enoughto consider what's true and real,
and always try to understand the way other people feel.
And be less quick to anger,and show appreciation more
and love the people in our liveslike we've never loved before.
If we treat each other with respect,and more often wear a smile...
remembering that this special dash might only last a little while.
So, when your eulogy is being read with your life's actions to rehash...
would you be proud of the things they say about how you spend your dash?

Autumn's here. . .

More pics/stories

2009-02-19T17:40:00.009+10:30

Ken came for a bit

Cousin Ben came to visit and we went all carnivourous in the German town in Adl.

Sherny lost his ring while at Justin's. He took it out while eating lunch. Needless to say, the first thought was, shoot, someone must have brushed it into the bin while cleaning up and Justin had already took out the rubbish. Yes, we then emptied the bag on the floor and went through it WITH OUR HANDS touching almost every single piece of rubbish in the bag looking for his lil ring...and thank GOD we found it there. and yes, when i picked him up from the airport, brought his baby photo to hold up. While ppl had big signboards with names, i had his baby photo.hehehe.

never treat your garbage collector with disrespect.

Sherny's first meal in Adelaide, courtesy of Handsome chai.

On CNY, which was also Australia day, was driving around town with the Aussie flag out one window and my Malaysia flag the other..but took the Malaysia down after awhile, figured some Aussies might find it disrespectful

Pics of the new place

2009-02-19T17:19:00.010+10:30

Autumn leaves come early on the garage floor

The lil garden patch with a fountain thingy that we have to make sure is well maintained and the living things there don't die.

The garage which has a lovely wooden roof thingy (i thinks called a pegola..or something??) and there's a nice lil table with 4 chairs which i can go have tea and just chillaxx.

The Kitchen

Dining

Hall + new human being..hehe

Mint and parsley plant which was a gift from Kak Shaleeni. I left the parsley out when it was 40+ celcius and it died. Sorrrryyy..Mint's a bit more hardy, managed to survive the heat, trying to slowly bring it back to life again and use it in cooking. I have to say this, 'May, i walked past your lavender patch in Adl Uni today and thought of you.'

New Human being's room, he recently rearranged it, looks a bit diff now.

My personal space, it's connected to a balcony

My fav spot in the hse so far, often times, its just me and Him and the world around us..occasionally the new human being too. haha.

Quick one

2009-02-16T13:20:00.002+10:30

Matthew 19:14 (New International Version)
14Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."

I had to stand in for a brother at Children's Church yesterday on the guitar. Boy, what an experience. It was so just so refreshing just to see these young ones singing praises to our King.
Not to forget too, to be playing with such professional guys. The only experience i can recollect for now in terms of serving with children is back in Sunday School and it was sometimes very cincai if i can say that. hehe. But at church here, it's a whole new diff level. What happen to action songs like 'Jesus loves me this i know'. Now, its drum-led Hillsongs, 'I'm not ashamed of the gospel'. My ears were ringing after that. Different songs, different eras, different environment.. same God.

Amazing.

I just might sign up to join the worship team for Children's church. :)

shifted to a new place. pics coming up soon. still no internet hence the lack of updates and slowness in replying emails, plus uni started already and handsome biological brother just arrived.

internet should be up tomorrow..i hope :)

Chai latte

2009-01-26T04:50:00.002+10:30

Its 4.51 am on the 26th of Jan. It's Australia day and also the first day of Chinese New Year and i can't sleep. That explains why i'm awake. Tried chai latte last night for the first time (thanks Cheryl and sorry again for breaking that infuser thingy) and it was good and i'm thinking it's because of that but www.organicsaustraliaonline.com says otherwise, that chai latte is a good sleep tonic.

Why can't i sleep?ish ish

Anyways, its happy chinese new year!!

haha...ba kuaaaaaaaaaa

Happy new year.

2009-01-03T09:46:00.002+10:30

Another year beckons. 362 days more to go.

Had our first OCF SA summer programme last night and Aunty M challenged us again on how are we going to live the remaining 362 days of the year.

Currently at uni using the internet to do some reading. Pray for me. I've got a paper on the 7th of Jan. or more like a presentation which requires a certain amount of reading and studying. Its super quiet here. As opposed to the usual busy-ness here at the com pools when it's hard to even get a computer.

I walked through Adelaide Uni's school of engineering today to get to the comp pools and i was again overcomed with gratefulness to Him. Sherny's coming over here in a couple weeks time and I am so excited. I can't wait. :) God has been so merciful to us as a family. 2008 really has been another year of receiving His mercy. Even when we did not deserve these things, out of His love and grace, He gave it to us. I look at Lynda's life too this year and even more, i am overcomed with a sense of gratefulness.

I think about mama and papa and the things they sacrificed for us and again, i'm blown away.

I am grateful too for cousins, aunts and uncles. Cousin Ben's around in Adelaide for a bit and eventhough i don't have much time to bring him around, i cherish the lazy-moments we have. (he's the musically gifted one and is here for a National Music Camp)

2009 has a lot of uncertainties.. as all new things do. Seeing how things have been unfurling in Israel the past few weeks, one can only wonder what God is doing and really, how long more do we have left. But i just would want to take a moment again, here, to give Him praise for the great things He has done and for what He is going to do and just totally surrender to Him trusting Him.

And just like that. . .

2008-12-29T21:19:00.008+10:30

perks of working in a mall, i get a privillege card which entitles me to pretty good bargains.

close up of my uniform

my overall uniform. its just the grey shirt with the word priceline on it and some cool designs on the collar

Christmas day

my attempt to be a good baby sitter. The rest of the Lee's were cherry picking while Kai and me just ate them. I dirtied my shorts and slippers with cherry juice while Kai dirtied his own clothes.

And just like that, it's almost 2009. Thank God i'm still in one piece. Made it through my second week at work and there's much progress in terms of the growing up side of me.

Celebrated my first ever Christmas without my biological family. I thank God for the other 'families' that i have here with me in Adelaide. Felt a bit like Chinese New Year at home coz we were going from one house to another just eating (food was a bit different, instead of chinese dishes, we had western stuffs) and the it was so hot!!! It's summer over here!!

On the 27th, couple of us 'remnants' went to experience the boxing day sales in Adelaide. For some reason, boxing day sales only starts on the 27th as opposed to the 26th for the other states in Australia. Made plans to be at the mall by 5.30 but i overslept. Thank God Erwin called and dragged me out of bed and manage to meet him and James at the mall at 5.45am. That particular mall only opened at 7 (we didnt know that) so being there so early, we were one of the early birds. And you know how the early birds always get the worms, each of us got a $103 dollars gift card. totally unexpected man. and it was David Jones (some mall which houses like really expensive brands, even after ridiculous discounts, i still think it's too overpriced).

Thank You Lord. :)

And right now, i would just like to take this moment to appreciate the one girl that has made me cry TWICE.

Ms. Lee Ee May.

I told myself that i would not cry at the airport when she left Adelaide back to KL but oh well..why try so hard??

haha.

You made a difference in my life.

missing you.

hope you have fun with chai chai and the rest. hehe.

Day 1

2008-12-15T21:20:00.003+10:30

Made it through Day 1 of Work. Thank God. :)

Thank you Uncle Yoon Loi and Aunty Woon Do for popping over at the pharmacy today. Not to forget Ms JC and LL too :) also, for the countless sms' of encouragement and prayers. I was almost late for work coz there was a burst pipe on Main North Rd (the road i take to work), thank God i left early and made it just in time.

Boy, super tired man.

Goal for the week: to last till Friday.

The Rising Tide

2008-12-14T00:07:00.002+10:30

It had all the elements of a typical Hollywood film. Away from home, slight drizzle (in replace of snow), Christmas carols in the background, gloomy clouds, nice fancy decoration and Christmas lightings and a good company to share and enjoy the time with.

I just realised again how blessed I am to be where I am right now in life. The beloved housemate left for holidays today and i now know how he felt when I was away but i thank God that so far, I'm handling it well. Instead of seeing misfortunes, i choose to see the opportunities available. And i thank God for this new change of perspectives. Hopefully, it's a sign of more to come.

Christmas is approaching; this will be my first time celebrating Christmas without my family, if memory serves me right, and yes, i'm missing them terribly but again, I'm choosing to focus on the opportunity to celebrate Christmas as how i see it should be done and not to forget the opportunity to celebrate it in a different country with a great bunch of friends and brothers and sisters.

I'm reminded again of The Best Gift of all that mankind could ever receive.

Thank You.

Work is starting this Monday. I'm pretty excited about it actually. Hello 5 days a week 9-5 working in a pharmacy. Let's see where this goes. Pray for me. That I will try to be a light for Him in an already broken world.

Fuuh...

2008-12-09T10:43:00.009+10:30

AGM 2008

A long lost buddy

4.30am.

Uncle's Church leader's son

Fuuuhhh indeed. What an incredible 2 weeks. Made a last minute random decision to fly to Sydney to chill for a bit. Spent some time with the Cousins. (one of them's coming over to Adl end of the month to stay with me - the good-looking one) Came back to Adelaide. Inherited Alva from Amanda for the summer. Packed and drove to Woodhouse for OCF Australia's annual convention, continued with AGM 2008, elected into EXCO OCF Australia. Had countless deep, thought-provoking conversations with a lot of people (one of them being Dr Calvin Ma, Director of OMF Aust) and now back in my lil unit in North Adelaide. fuuhhhh....

Finally get to breathe.

I look forward in anticipation of what is to come. If there is one thing that i sense God was challenging a lot of us during the past few weeks (thru the devo's, BS's, sharings, conversations) was that hey, I AM returning soon and what are you doing about it?

Work's starting this Monday. That leaves me with the next few days to slowly settle back into the daily grind. Gotta prepare myself for what is to come.

At the threshold of a new era

2008-11-16T20:19:00.003+10:30

If any of you, like me, used to watch TV3 at 6pm back in Malaysia, you would recognize the title of this aptly-named post as a familiar name of a popular Hong Kong series. man, I can't even remember what it was all about but i remembered watching it diligently everyday not understanding a single thing the characters were saying but just reading the malay subtitles.

And so, i find myself really in a very interesting position. I'm at the brink of another chapter in my life. After studying for a bit at the Uni library today, i decided to take a walk home instead of the usual bus. (also, i missed the free shuttle service from the city to my suburb..hah) But yea, used to walk home from uni, takes about 30-40mins and i really enjoyed it. Haven't had the chance to do it regularly since the surgery though. And yes, i sometimes enjoy long walks, especially when the birdies are flying around singing, sun is shining, flowers are blooming and the guys are playing some good football at the nearby field. (i can't waittt...haha)

From starting Uni in a lil place call Sepang Institute of Technology to coming over to the University of South Australia..it really has been a journey. As i look back, there were times where i really did not like where i was in life, i really was impatient with how long i was taking to learn some of the things, how things were around me and not to mention all the moments when i wondered boy, am i really doing the right thing and things like, man, is this really me? (yes, i used to struggle A LOT with my self-esteem and self-identity, i would think that a person would finally be rid of all these struggles come 21 but i guess i can be wrong).

I've come to see that God really does not make mistakes. Every single experience that i have went through, every single question that i asked and pondered on, every single person that i have met, every single classes i went for, this course that i am in and studying for (every single girl that i have had a crush on..haha..yes.even that!!!) ....EVERYTHING!!!!! had a purpose. Whether it being life-changing, character-building, emotionally-challenging... It had a pupose! I will not be who I am today if anyone of those experiences was not there. When I'm not doing anything, i can end up thinking a lot and i realized too every single thoughts played out in my mind has an impact. I guess i'm beginning to see how everything is a means to an end. (used to think that i was in the wrong course but i've realized that this is for me as it helped deal with some of the issues that i have been struggling with)

God is Faithful. . . . even when we are not.

I wrote the following in my blog description last year and i called it 'Home alone'. Home alone refers to this time of my life where i feel like i have been 'thrown into the lion's den'; everything that i once held so dear at home have been 'temporarily' removed from me and i need to learn to how to 'live' all over again. So,I'm hoping that maybe i will go 'home' changed...for the better, i hope. God Bless.

And i feel that a new season is beginning in my life which led to the new blog title.

Sojourn of a Pilgrim.

I look ahead and i see the one thousand and one ways of how things now can transpire and how it may affect me. I feel so grateful because i know that He is in control. I really feel His peace guarding my heart (Philippians 4:7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus). He is really building me up and moulding me to be more like Him. I sometimes dream that i will one day first be a missionary and then end working in church leadership but i've come to realized that i am a missionary NOW and also a priest NOW. (1 Pet 2:9 But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light) side note: i just realized that we are priests so that we can praise Him, again another reminder to me that this life is all about Him.

Yes, i still have a heart for my home, Malaysia but i'm beginning to have a more global perspective to where God may be calling me to. (maybe mission work in a foreign land first and then church in Malaysia?haha) and of course, things like these are HUGE and beyond me right now (i may end up doing something totally different, who knowss..) but I am His and He knows me better than i know myself. He knows what excites me and what I am created for.

Christianitytoday did a survey among some American pastors recently. The question put forward was 'is the Kingdom of God a present reality, future reality or both?' 37% said future, 20% said present whilst 33% said it was both. Interestingly, 58% of them said that they believed the kingdom of God is a future reality 10 years ago. I believe that the Kingdom of God is both but i may be wrong (haven't did much research on it yet, but will get to it one day) but the point I'm making is that there is also a shift in paradigm amongst the Church today. Whether for good or bad i dont know yet but i can only pray that His will be done with His bride.

And i ask Him now to see where i fit in His great scheme of things and what does He want me to do.

Aunty Mei Lin emailed me a devo from 'Our daily bread' and the following is an excerpt from it.

F. B. Meyer said, “What a chapter might be written of God’s delays! It is the mystery of the art of educating human spirits to the finest temper of which they are capable. What searchings of heart, what analyzings of motives, what testings of the Word of God, what upliftings of soul. . . . All these are associated with those weary days of waiting, which are, nevertheless, big with spiritual destiny.” — David H. Roper

Be still, My child, and know that I am God!
Wait thou patiently—I know the path you trod.
So falter not, nor fear, nor think to run and hide,
For I, thy hope and strength, am waiting by thy side. —Hein

And the Spirit comes

2008-11-13T12:06:00.002+10:30

HELP ME BELIEVE
Take me back to the time
When I was maybe eight or nine
And I believed
When Jesus walked on waters blue
And if He helped me, I could too
If I believed
Before rationale, analysis and systematic thinking
Robbed me of a sweet simplicity
When wonders and when mysteries
Were far less often silly dreams
And childhood fantasies
Help me believe'
Cause I don't want to miss any miracles
Maybe I'd see much better by closing my eyes
And I would shed this grownup skin I'm in
To touch an angel's wing
And I would be free
Help me believe
When mustard seeds made mountains move
A burning bush that spoke for You was good enough
When manna fell from heavens high
Just because You told the sky to open up
Am I too wise to recognise that everything uncertain
Is certainly a possibility?
When logic fails my reasoning
And science crushes underneath
The weight of all that is unseen
Help me believe'
Cause I don't want to miss any miracles
Maybe I'd see much better by closing my eyes
And I would shed this grownup skin I'm in
To touch an angel's wing
And I would be free
Help me believe
When someone else's education
Plays upon my reservations
I'm the first to cave, I'm the first to bleed
If I abandon all that seeksTo make my faith informed and chic
Could You, would You show Yourself to me?
Help me believe'
Cause I don't want to miss any miracles
Maybe I'd see much better by closing my eyes
And I would shed this grownup skin I'm in
To touch an angel's wing
And I would be free

Help me believe

SMALL ENOUGH
Oh, GREAT GOD, BE SMALL ENOUGH TO HEAR ME NOW
THERE WERE TIMES WHEN I WAS CRYING
FROM THE DARK OF DANIEL'S DEN
AND I HAVE ASKED YOU ONCE OR TWICE
IF YOU WOULD PART THE SEA AGAIN
BUT TONIGHT I DO NOT NEED A FIERY PILLAR IN THE SKY
JUST WANNA KNOW YOU'RE GONNA HOLD ME IF I START TO CRY
OH, GREAT GOD, BE SMALL ENOUGH TO HEAR ME NOW
OH, GREAT GOD, BE CLOSE ENOUGH TO FEEL YOU NOW
THERE HAVE BEEN MOMENTS WHEN I COULD NOT
FACE GOLIATH ON MY OWN
AND HOW COULD I FORGET WE'VE MARCHED AROUND
OUR SHARE OF JERICHOS
BUT I WILL NOT BE SETTING OUT A FLEECE FOR YOU TONIGHT
JUST WANNA KNOW THAT EVERYTHING WILL BE ALRIGHT
OH GREAT GOD, BE CLOSE ENOUGH TO FEEL YOU NOW
ALL PRAISE AND ALL HONOR BE
TO THE GOD OF ANCIENT MYSTERIES
WHOSE EVERY SIGN AND WONDER TURN THE PAGES OF OUR HISTORY
BUT TONIGHT MY HEART IS HEAVY
AND I CANNOT KEEP FROM WHISPERING THIS PRAYER
"ARE YOU THERE?"
AND I KNOW YOU COULD LEAVE WRITING ON THE WALL
THATS JUST FOR ME
OR SEND WISDOM WHILE I'M SLEEPING,
LIKE IN SOLOMAN'S SWEET DREAMS
BUT I DON'T NEED THE STRENGTH OF SAMSON
OR A CHARIOT IN THE END
JUST WANT TO KNOW THAT YOU STILL KNOW HOW MANY HAIRS
ARE ON MY HEAD
OH GREAT GOD, BE SMALL ENOUGH TO HEAR ME NOWh, GREAT GOD, BE SMALL ENOUGH TO HEAR ME NOW
THERE WERE TIMES WHEN I WAS CRYING
FROM THE DARK OF DANIEL'S DEN
AND I HAVE ASKED YOU ONCE OR TWICE
IF YOU WOULD PART THE SEA AGAIN
BUT TONIGHT I DO NOT NEED A FIERY PILLAR IN THE SKY
JUST WANNA KNOW YOU'RE GONNA HOLD ME IF I START TO CRY
OH, GREAT GOD, BE SMALL ENOUGH TO HEAR ME NOW
OH, GREAT GOD, BE CLOSE ENOUGH TO FEEL YOU NOW
THERE HAVE BEEN MOMENTS WHEN I COULD NOT
FACE GOLIATH ON MY OWN
AND HOW COULD I FORGET WE'VE MARCHED AROUND
OUR SHARE OF JERICHOS
BUT I WILL NOT BE SETTING OUT A FLEECE FOR YOU TONIGHT
JUST WANNA KNOW THAT EVERYTHING WILL BE ALRIGHT
OH GREAT GOD, BE CLOSE ENOUGH TO FEEL YOU NOW
ALL PRAISE AND ALL HONOR BE
TO THE GOD OF ANCIENT MYSTERIES
WHOSE EVERY SIGN AND WONDER TURN THE PAGES OF OUR HISTORY
BUT TONIGHT MY HEART IS HEAVY
AND I CANNOT KEEP FROM WHISPERING THIS PRAYER
"ARE YOU THERE?"
AND I KNOW YOU COULD LEAVE WRITING ON THE WALL
THATS JUST FOR ME
OR SEND WISDOM WHILE I'M SLEEPING,
LIKE IN SOLOMAN'S SWEET DREAMS
BUT I DON'T NEED THE STRENGTH OF SAMSON
OR A CHARIOT IN THE END
JUST WANT TO KNOW THAT YOU STILL KNOW HOW MANY HAIRS
ARE ON MY HEAD
OH GREAT GOD, BE SMALL ENOUGH TO HEAR ME NOW

I thank God that He is with me even through this. Was going through some self-defeating thoughts while studying in the quiet area in the library and didnt know what to do but just to pray.

And His Spirit came.

Was led to these 2 songs above by Nichole Nordeman. The lyrics really expresses my heart and what I'm going through. Was also then reminded of an incident when we as a family were struggling together during Ahma's battle with her sickness. She was very sick and i didnt know why but one morning i got up and found this verse 1Thessa 5:16-18 in my Bible, wrote it on a piece of paper and stuck it on the stairs so that mum would see it the first thing she got up...coz i was too shy to tell her. was very young and shy then..i think i still am. :)

16Be joyful always; 17pray continually; 18give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

Thank You

Childhood memories

2008-11-07T10:20:00.006+10:30

Childhood comes once in a lifetime but the memories stays forever.

-Daniel Lee (7th November 2008)

Woke up this morning and was recalling with The Housemate our childhood experiences. It's always good to reminisce and see how wonderful God has been to us.

-Mum had to always carry my bag for me and walk with me all the way to my class when i was in Standard 1 and i think she had to do it till Standard 3. I remember when i was in Standard 1, mum had to always be at the classroom door or at least the canteen to pick me up. If she wasn't there, i would go throw a tantrum and cry like really really bad. There was once i went berserk and my classmates had to go call her to come personally to pick me up from the classroom. Haha. She told me later how embarassed she was.

-One of the days in primary school i would never forget was when mum came to pick me up from school and she said that her colleague who went to UK for holidays got me what i wanted. My first ever official Man Utd jersey with my first official Man Utd football magazine. I was grinning from ear to ear. That really cheered me up. She didn't know that just before she came, i had a bad encounter with some bullies. All the fear went away went i heard what she said :)

-Another day i would never forget was when i came to school one day and my friends came and told me, 'wei jin, u passed PTS (some exam which if u passed, you could skip std 4)'. how i only wished i could be scoring those kind of results now. But yea, the thing about it that really made me remember it was that the discipline teacher then, Puan Lee said that those who cleared that exam had to donate RM1,000 to the school PIBG. I was like..aiyo..how laaaaa??????

-Ah Ma used to make really good milos and butter toast with sugars. man..i miss her.

-i remember wanting to buy adidas predator football boots so that i could look like David Beckham. I even bought brylcream to centre part my hair.

-I looked forward to Daddy's return from overseas coz he would get me all these transformers and also Tamiya cars with spare parts. i feel so bad now for not keeping them properly.

-I remember sitting down with Dad in the old house cutting up bamboo trees and making model planes with them. We used rubber bands to hold them together. I also remember playing football once with Dad. He's always very busy with work but that one day when he played with me, i will never forget.

-I remember being forced to eat these really yucky vit c chewable tablets and i would always hide it under my tongue and would then later spit it out into the toilet bowl and flush it away. Not to mention hiding the cane so that our parents couldn't find it.

-I remember telling mum one afternoon that Sherny and me would go mop the kitchen for her. (she trained us to mop floor by going down on all fours and using clothes to wipe the floor) Sherny and i used all the distilled water that we collected to mop the floor and we ended up flooding the kitchen and playing with water in the kitchen. Needless to say, we got our fair share of spankings.

-Not to forget the times when i fell asleep on my workbooks which we would buy from the Formula workshop or Leong agency and salivate all over them...i never finished them. haha

-and not to forget too, the countless fights i had with Sherny and Lyn. We were champion wrestlers then.

What are yours?

i look back and i thank God that He has blessed us so much. I look back and also realize all the energy and effort put in raising 3 children. We only hope that all the sacrifices were worth it. And that when mum, papa, ahma and mama, ahkong and all the aunties and uncles (biological and not biological) look at us, they would be proud.

Elections

2008-11-06T00:30:00.002+10:30

‘Americans never quit. We never surrender. We never hide from history, we make history.’

-John McCain, in his Concession Speech, after losing to Barack Obama in the US Presidential campaign

Indeed, the much talked and discussed about US Presidential campaign has finally come to an end. It really has been an interesting journey. After all the immense resources spent on campaigning, I am very much grateful that the next President of the USA has been elected. I think that the money spent on campaigning should have been put to better use.

Listening to Barack Obama’s winning speech, I can’t help wonder whether are there any hidden agendas. Then again, I’m sure all politicians have ‘other agendas’. Where did they get all the money for their campaigns? From private investors I reckon. It’s interesting to see how Barack’s stand on pro-choice, stem cell research and homosexuality marriages would affect the local and global community.

I’ve only took a recent interest in ‘adult-y’ things recently, must be due to the whole realization that hey, I’m growing up and pretty soon, I’ve to fend for myself (haha) in this Beautifully created place called Earth but has been polluted by us.

Barack’s winning speech was certainly inspiring while John’s one was filled with grace and humility. Both I’m sure are great leaders and we can all learn a thing from do.

Man, just read about Proposition 8. A motion being voted in California that will either legalize or NOT gay marriages.

In the midst of all this, what does a Child of the Most High do?

On his knees.

Some of the things I will be praying for tonight (so that you can pray with me too):

-The USA and that God's will for the country will come forth

-Persecuted brothers and sisters in the the country of Uganda

-A very special brother who i deeply miss and love serving Him in the country of Indonesia

-A sister who received good news

-A brother who is leaving for Malaysia after finishing his studies here in Adelaide

-Myself, that i will stay true to Him and to what He has called me to.

Let's go

2008-10-30T14:12:00.002+10:30

Wow.

In His mercy, and God-willing, i will be starting my career as a pharmacist in a pharmacy at a local shopping complex.

It's interesting how the events unfolded.

I sent out my resume on Tuesday night (Wed morning more like it, at 12.30am). Got a call on Wed morning at 11ish am, went in for an interview on Thursday afternoon and got offered the job on the Friday. After praying and talking to some wise ppl, i took it up on Sat morning. Much thanks to a few individuals also who helped me in ways unimaginable (you know who you are :p).

Boy, am i excited!!

The past few days have just been filled with dreams and of interesting thoughts like, where am i going to go from here? What's my 5 yr goal? and questions along those lines. Then there was also the whole issue with whether to go back to M'sia or to stay here. (it's like i sorta know where God is calling/leading me to now but i'm just too stubborn)

As the semester draws to a close, i look back and recall all the experiences that i had in uni. Just had lunch with some of my mates and we were all reminiscing about the past and saying how we're going to share each other's embarassing photos/stories on our wedding days. haha. Let's see..I thank God for the friends that He has given me, for the experiences He has allowed me to go through. For sure, there were ups and downs but all in all, God still be praised :)

Assessments are around the corner and after that...who knows. but right now, i just want to stop and take a moment and thank Him and praise Him for EVERYTHING.

Aites, time to return to the books.

peace.

-might write more on the past 4 yrs and on what is to come later.

sttooooodiiieeee.

Thoughts

2008-10-22T15:37:00.005+10:30

I praise You O Lord for the good times and the bad times.

The past few weeks, i have had this burden on my heart. With the impending end of uni, this huge weight of whether i'll be able to get a job here lies heavily upon my heart. Yes, i would want to work in Australia, purely on the grounds to have the experience of working in an overseas country. My heart at the end of the day is to return to where i was conceived, my homeland Malaysia. Coursemates have been getting calls and going for interviews while no one seemed to have responded to my resumes. And yea, been feeling down. Its not a nice feeling to be 'left out'. Haha.

This morning I woke up praying, asking God just for that one thing to motivate me again to push on. For that one thing. Lo and behold, in His mercy, He gave me that.

Just got a call from a pharmacy to go in tomorrow for an interview and boy, am i ecstatic. I don't care whether i get the job or not but right now, i just want to enjoy this feeling for the moment and go back to praying and asking Him for directions.

I have been faced with failures and various incidents in the past 2 yrs that i've sort of lost my self-confidence. It's true that at the end of the day, i want to be purely confident in Him (maybe He's teaching me that....). Like i always thought the problem with me is that i cannot keep focus on one thing but various things have suggested otherwise. I thought i don't have discipline but i have seen discipline expressed in various forms in me. Just not the same way it's expressed in other people. I did things that people suggested or followed other peoples example and tried as i much, it just didnt work. The end result was always the same. This morning I was just pouring that frustration out to Him and said, 'Lord, you know me the best. You created me. You know me better than I know myself. Amen'

Even with the Pharmacy profession. I STILL have my doubts about whether is this the right one for me. I'm not FULLY enjoying what i study, there are moments of ups and downs and i really don't see myself doing this long term(then again, i haven't fully experienced what this profession is to offer, i'm probably only at the tip of the iceberg..so who knowss...) But today again, i thank God that He spoke to me through a certain lecturer during my tut. To start it, i got a good rating from the counselling session we had. (Our tutorials are basically like acting classes now, we take turns acting as pharmacists while the lecturers/tutors/pharmacists are our patients). Mind you, i usually get borderline ratings but today, i had a bit better. I was so used to getting borderline ratings that i thought hey, maybe thats who I'm going to be, a borderline pharmacist.haha. But todays rating made me realised that hey, i actually can counsel somebody. The lecturer i had today went on talking about how he knew of some pharmacists who gave up the thought of spending less time with patients just so that they have more patients which of course meant more profit to actually spend more time with patients. He trained his staffs to do all the dispensing so that he need not have to dispense AT ALL and had the time to just talk to his patients. He went on making more money as his patients liked him so much.

That excites me..spending time with people and i'm thinking hey, i could actually enjoy this. This whole pharmacy thing could be a means to an end. Like hey, give out a tract to every Panadol sold. haha.

I've come to learn and experienced that God will work when there is a total surrender of one self and i am reminded again that it is the Person i should seek and not what He can do.

Long term, i would most probably pursue this crazy idea of doing full time or mission work but i want to be a tentmaker, like Paul. So right now, i'm just going to pick up where i left and pushed on this journey of self-discovery and more importantly, discovering more about Him, my First Love.

Thank You, Love

Joshua

2008-10-20T20:56:00.003+10:30

I was at the evening service in Edge Church yesterday. Its probably the equivalent of Hillsongs/Shakers church in Syd and Melb for Adelaide. Funny thing happened. There was a bunch of us and we entered the church and got our seats. It was probably 5-6 rows from the front. After everyone got seated, i realised there was none left for me so i left everyone else and went to sit in the front alone. It was the second row from the front.

So there I was, worshipping God amongst Aussies and they suddenly did the whole, 'Aights, say hi to someone next to you.' And so i did, but when i introduced myself, no one got the name Wei Jin. It was like, 'Hi, I'm Wei Jin. ' 'Huh?' 'Weeei Jin' 'Huh?' And i dont know why but i blurted out 'Joshua' after a couple of times saying 'Wei Jin'. And they went,'oh, Hi, Josh!!' Haha. Must be thinking too much of Josh Lim in Klg. Oh well..from now on, I'm Josh Wong. LOL. hmm...or what about just Jin? That'd be quite cool eh?

And guess who i sat next to....one of the Guglimucci's. Forgotten his name but it was Mike Gug's brother.

Updates

2008-10-19T22:02:00.005+10:30

Thank God sis is done with Pmr. now its the brother with his SAM. haha

haha, i think my family and i has a weird sense of humor. mum passed my ielts results thru maymay.

been collecting pine cones. brings back memories.

i rmb when we used to go to aust as a family for holidays and mum would get us to pick good ones to bring back to msia for decos in the hse. haha. we super swakoo ppl.

The past few weeks have been refreshing, i must say although it flew by very quickly. Been spending a lot of time by the river nearby just to destress and reflect. Everything seems to look prettier during spring. Birds are flying and singing, sun is shining, flowers are blooming, tall trees are oh so magnificent, everyone's outdoors.

'O taste and see that the LORD is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in Him'

Psalm 34:8

Leg's coming along ok. There are days when it dosent feel that bad and you think everythings ok and u push it a bit and the next day, it swells up and pain comes back and im reminded again that im not exactly fully functionable yet. So yea, the past few weeks hv been pretty much a mix of contrasting emotions:happy days when leg would be all good or depressed days when it hurts a bit. But everytime when that happens, i try to put things into perspective, there are more important things to think about than to whine about the long rehab process.

God has been working and is still working with me and He's calling me to something..

Just need that lil bit of faith.

'Quiet Time'

2008-10-01T22:06:00.002+09:30

Abang Danny sent me this yesterday and i thought it was quite apt with what i was gong through.

http://www.liveasif.org/view.cgi?article=4864

'Quiet Time' with Kasia Kedzia

Sep 30, 2008

When Your Best Is Not Good Enough

Over the past few weeks I have been more busy then usual. This busyness has felt good even when it bordered frustration. It felt good because I felt as though I was accomplishing things, helping people and being productive. Yet, all those warm, fuzzy, good feelings were torn to little peaces and stomped on by this weekend.

During my time of ‘the good busyness’ there had been challenges that come up; family crisis that needed to be addressed, friendships that needed extra tending to, household issues left not completely dealt with and of course work challenges. As these different things came up I addressed them to the best of my ability and kept right on trooping, feeling pretty good about having made every effort and thought that I had kept my focus on God while doing so.

However, sometimes no matter how hard I try I can feel like my best is just not good enough. So this past weekend, when the family issues reared their ugly head again, when work dished out a portion which I simply felt inadequate to handle while watching others coast on by, when a roommate completely dismissed and disacknowledged all my efforts, and when a friend felt disappointed in me, I felt like a failure in every aspect of my life. I had run out of love to give. I had been doing a lot but I had not been praying.

Job 39:11 (NIV) Will you rely on him for his great strength? Will you leave your heavy work to him?

One failure after the next I tried to keep a happy face but eventually they all welled up to the surface until they began to gush out of me in streams of tears. Once this started, no matter how hard I tried I could not stop it, the tears kept coming and the pain, frustration and feeling of utter helplessness coiled tightly around my heart and stomach. I failed to fix what was broken. All my efforts had not been good enough. In this moment, I realized no matter how much I wanted my parent, boss, roommate and friend to see and legitimize all my efforts they could not. I realized that all though I was doing all I could to please God I was measuring my efforts by the human response scale. I was unable to perform and produce results by my own strength hence why I felt like an utter failure. I had not failed in God’s eyes but because I was not looking to Him I was unable to see past myself. All the while, I hadn’t given it over to the only one who could do anything about it.

1 Chronicles 28:20 (Message) David continued to address Solomon: "Take charge! Take heart! Don't be anxious or get discouraged. GOD, my God, is with you in this; he won't walk off and leave you in the lurch. He's at your side until every last detail is completed for conducting the worship of GOD.

When I turned to God after the sobs ceased and there was no energy left to fight I was still, partly because I had no more energy to be anything but still, and partly because God stilled me.

Psalm 65:7 (NAS) Who stills the roaring of the seas, The roaring of their waves, And the tumult of the peoples.

I realized that although he calls me to love and give to others, He also, in that same way loves me and wants to give to me. So when I feel like there is nothing left to give and I have failed in every way, God calls me to take heart and allow Him to love me for the mess I am. He wants me to come before Him and is waiting to listen. He will fix what is broken in His time and He will fix me when I’m broken. I know there will be many more times when my efforts will just seem not good enough but I must have faith that they are good enough for God. I must hope for better days. Finally, I must allow him to love me in order to be able to continue to love others.

Isaiah 35:4 (Message) Tell fearful souls, "Courage! Take heart! GOD is here, right here, on his way to put things right And redress all wrongs. He's on his way! He'll save you!"

1 Corinthians 13 (NIV) 4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Meet the Author:
Gods brought me a long way from the New York City Housing Projects. I studied the Bible, repented, and was baptized for the forgiveness of my sins when I was 17 and have been repenting and striving towards heaven ever since. The hardest thing about becoming a Christian at 17 was trusting that God would take care of me, meet my emotional teen needs, and help me overcome my enormous insecurities…what else would a teen girl have trouble with?

Since those first days, I have made it out of the Projects, finished my Masters degree in International Development, and moved to DC to work in my field. As a young single Christian woman my struggles today are a little different than they were when I first came to know God, but who am I kidding, not much. It’s the every day battle for my heart to be pure before God, to strive to please him, and help others to seek and know Him.

Over my years of a faithful walk with God I have received much grace and compassion and have been blessed beyond my wildest dreams. Through out it all one thing has stayed consistent: God’s word. Through His word I have been inspired and it has kept me faithful even when faith seemed like a foreign concept and God seemed deaf to my prayers. I started emailing my Quiet Times which helped me stay accountable as I shared my struggles and fought for understanding. Some wrote back and said they too were inspired and could relate. I hope some of my times can help inspire others who are seeking and fighting just like I am, to get to heaven and take as many as possible with me along the way.

Isaiah 43:18-19

2008-09-30T12:15:00.003+09:30

I suscribe to Rick Warren's Purpose Driven Life Daily Devotional and a whole host of other daily mails/updates/news/devos from other Christian ministries. So much so that sometimes i don't pay much attention in reading them, i just skim through them. hehe. I just like to expose myself to as much things as i can when i still can absorb. (more like try la ;P)

Today's entry from Rick Warren was interesting and somehow much relevant to me.

Isaiah 43:18-19
Forget the former things, do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.

*the computer labs here at uni just undergone a hardware update, we have uber cool huge screens now. Blogging has never been this fun!! haha, not to mention..wideeeeee*

I've been dwelling too much on the 'if only's. So much that i think it has paralysed me from doing things and being myself, and to move on.

I had a verse for the OCFer's during Kairos (OCF SA's annual leadership 'retreat') over the recent weekend. Joshua 3:5 "Consecrate yourselves, for tomorrow the LORD will do amazing things among you." I felt, especially in our local centre that a season is ending a new one is beginning, one filled with GREAT things. But before THAT can happen, there is a need for us to consecrate ourselves and to really put Him first in our lives, individually and corporately. Another verse came about on the following day of Kairos, Luke 9:23 "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me."

Never saw it to be so real to me too. Actually, from past experiences, everytime i had a verse or a word for the people around me, it seemed to be so relevant to me too. Maybe its His way to make sure i don't swell up with pride.

I thank God for Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

and the promise from Isaiah that when His word is preached, it will not return to Him void.
(ish, can't remember where that's from)

and whoooosh, the Comforter arrives.

:)

Broken

2008-09-28T21:03:00.003+09:30

Send some rain, would You send some rain?
'Cause the earth is dry and needs to drink again
And the sun is high and we are sinking in the shade
Would You send a cloud, thunder long and loud?
Let the sky grow black and send some mercy down
Surely You can see that we are thirsty and afraid
But maybe not, not today
Maybe You'll provide in other ways
And if that's the case . . .

(Chorus)

We'll give thanks to You
With gratitude
For lessons learned in how to thirst for You
How to bless the very sun that warms our face
If You never send us rain

Daily bread, give us daily bread
Bless our bodies, keep our children fed
Fill our cups, then fill them up again tonight
Wrap us up and warm us through
Tucked away beneath our sturdy roofs
Let us slumber safe from danger's view this time
Or maybe not, not today
Maybe You'll provide in other ways
And if that's the case . . .

(Chorus)

We'll give thanks to You
With gratitude
A lesson learned to hunger after You
That a starry sky offers a better view if no roof is overhead And if we never taste that bread

Oh, the differences that often are between
What we want and what we really need

So grant us peace, Jesus, grant us peace
Move our hearts to hear a single beat
Between alibis and enemies tonight
Or maybe not, not today
Peace might be another world away
And if that's the case . . .

(Chorus)

We'll give thanks to You
With gratitude
For lessons learned in how to trust in You
That we are blessed beyond what we could ever dream
In abundance or in need
And if You never grant us peace

But Jesus, would You please . . .

This song sorta describes some of my current emotions.

Luke 9:23 Then He said to them all, "If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me.

It's not an easy journey. I just pray for peace.

Random pics

2008-09-15T22:21:00.016+09:30

OCF Uni SA's outgoing and incoming committee minus one

OCF Uni SA's outgoing committee. The missing guy was replaced by a picture and a 'drawing'. Haha.

Attended the Pharmacy Guild Ball. The theme was Vintage Hollywood (whatever that means). haha. First time wearing a hat, always thought I wasn't the hat-type kinda person, never thought i could pull it off but thanks to Ju-Lear, Yat Tuang and Sher Ri, i found one to wear...on the day before. Wasn't planning on spending any more $$ on the whole thing. The ticket was already so expensive. But yea, hat cost another extra aud 15 and i reckon i could wear it for other occasions too.

My 2 years anniversary

2008-09-11T10:11:00.003+09:30

To my dearest Anterior Cruciate Ligament,

You used to reside in between my femur and tibia of my right knee but God chose to remove you for reasons still not fully known. Today marks the 2 years anniversary of living life without you. As my fellow human beings remember the loss when the Twin Towers came down in USA, I remember you.

Life really hasn't been the same since you 'left'. Watching football on tv has never been the same. Thoughts like, 'oh man, i can't wait to try that move on the field' have now turned to, 'oh my, he better be careful less he loses his ACL too'. Running up stairs and zig zag used to be pain free but now, it's a different story all together.

I thought i could move on without you. I remember the day when i tried to play a game of football with some of the guys. Boy, what an experience. I never want to go through that again. Everytime i swing my leg, i felt like the lower part of the leg was going to 'fly off'. I missed your grip and your strength. You held my legs together and really gave me stability. Since you were gone, life really hasn't been the same.

I must say, i kept wishing things were different. That you did not have to leave. But i gave this body of mine to Him a long time ago already and told Him to do as He pleases. And so, i have to move in obedience.

The past 2 years wasn't easy. I remember the times when i argued with my parents because i was so adamant to go get a replacement for you ASAP. To the point that they said i could do as i please. It was a struggle inside. I knew i wanted a replacement fast but at the same time, i just could not bring myself to dishonour them. And so, i moved in obedience again to wait and see how life would be without you. I remember the countless times i see people running and playing football freely and wished that i could be part of them too. I remember the times when i tried jogging and had to slow down due to the pain and well, let some old uncle overtake me and say, 'aiyo, you young man, why so slow?' Obviously, my ego took control of me. Not to forget the many times i fell into sadness and lamenting my predicament.

Over time, i realised that a replacement was needed and its currently in the position you vacated. Boy, was it an experience. To undergo surgery at 21. Who would have thought?
To my tendon whos now acting as a pseudo-ACL, i appreciate what you are doing for me in my right knee. You were not created for this function but medical advancements allows you to help the other ligaments in that area by taking up ACL's spot. I pray and hope that you will last this 'journey of life' till i die. I will do what i can to support you with physiotherapy.

By God's grace, i have not sustained any major injuries over the past 2 years. I look back also still wondering why you, my ACL, left. Apart from the countless dollars i have saved from futsal, i can't think of anything that has impacted me. Although, compared to the dollars spent in getting the replacement, i rather play futsal. I may be wiser now and maybe when i return to the field, i could be a better player. I have to choose my tackles wisely, move wisely and play wisely too. I will probably appreciate every single second on the field now also.

I look at other people. Those who are in a more serious condition than i am like cancer etc and i thank God that i still have life. I will learn not to focus so much on what i don't have but on what i have. It always has been a struggle as i can be more of a pessimists at times.

Maybe this is the lesson to be learnt. To seize what i have and make full use of it.

To my ACL, i miss you but life goes on. I look forward to the day when i can play football again. 10 more months.

My childhood dream of playing for Manchester United still holds.

:)

La la chai

2008-09-08T21:05:00.007+09:30

*disclaimer: This post does not seek to stereotype people or accused others of bad fashion taste as the author believes that each individual has the right to dress and look in however they wish to a certain level.

Manda said that my new haircut looks like a typical australasian look. (you should see students when they leave home for Australia to study-most of 'em will cut their hair short to save money on haircuts here and we all look so cute and youngish..haha. Went to this place opposite ACS Klang called Ahead just to try the place out before coming back to Adelaide)

A lot of the people here dressed what some Malaysians would call 'lala'-ly and they actually look quite cool. Even the asians here. I think its just the fashion. Something 'lala' back home would i guess be 'in' here. haha. And so when Manda said that, i was like.hmm..means, i look 'lala'. (boy, was i happy to be associated with a seafood.hehe. didnt get to eat my share of seafood when i was back because of an old wive's tale-seafood not good to eat during post op and i still cant eat them. ) Now i only need some tight jeans and tight black t and probably some blonde streaks in my hair. I've already got the necklace and i guess a bracelet would be a bonus. Not to forget the leather sling bag.

Pirated cd's anyone???hehe

The pharmacy guild ball is this coming Saturday, i might just go there dressed like a true Klangite. hmm..but seriously, what should i wear?

The picture above shows my new hairdo(actually come to think of it, not much diff also..oh well..haha) and me in a wheelchair at KLIA. Yup, i was in a wheelchair all the way from KLIA right to the moment i was picked up from Adelaide airport. You really get top priority. I got to cut queues and be the first to check in and first to get onto the plane, was even in the first row after the business class coz i need the leg space. There was about 8 of us which needed special attention ie wheelchairs, me and 7 other frail looking elderly people. One of them just went for a heart bypass. So yea, you can pretty much imagine everyone's awkward stares at me when we all passed them. I just held tightly to my crutch. haha

Last week at OCF, i jumped straight back into helping leading an Alpha group and we got a really interesting question. If God adopted us all as His children than Jesus should not be His only Son as said. How to answer?

I also realised that we sometimes see God through lenses. For example, if a child has bad relationship with his/her father or a bad picture of a father and never had a father figure in his/her life. The illustration of God as Our Father would not really appeal to her and strike her. But God is still the Father. How we see Him does not affect who He really is. And so i guess, i think we should learn to pray to ask God to move all this lenses that we use to see Him with to really know and see Him for Who He really is.

I'm looking forward to this Sunday. Can finally catch my breath and then maybe go for a swim after church.

OCF Uni SA Agm is this Friday too. I will be stepping down from my current position. Oh boy..what's next??

Reflections

2008-09-03T11:41:00.003+09:30

As I was driving home from physio yesterday (yes, i can drive already for those who have been asking - have been driving myself to physio and dropping Mum off at work, so kind of her to let me use her car), i realised that this 'handicap' of mine will always be there. I was ecstatic and how i could walk again after being so 'disabled' after the surgery. So much so that i 'forgot' that my right knee is still missing something (they removed a tendon to be my new pseudo-ACL, so eventhough i've got a new pseudo-ACL, i'm missing a tendon near my patella region).

I thought I was normal and able again.

All that disappeared when the physiotherapist reminded me of do's and don'ts when in Adelaide during this year long of recuperation and i was brought back down to earth. He mentioned that before the op, i probably had 75% use of my knee and after the op, i may be able to achieve 90-95% with good and adequate physio for the next 6 months.

Why not 100%?

I guess some things are not meant to be.

So, my friend, if you see me hobbling, please gently remind me to make a conscious effort to walk properly as i'm still paranoid about my right knee and don't put enough pressure on it. Note: gently remind me, not slap on my back as what i used to ask you to do if you see me hunching. Now, if you slap me on the back, i might fall and tear another ligament and the cycle worsens. haha. Do check on me also to make sure that i'm diligent in my physiotherapy sessions. (I bought a pair of goggles to 'revive' my swimming 'career' - doctors have been saying that it's one the safest and effective form of physio. Anyone care for a swim?haha). I still can't fully bend my knee and definitely can't duduk bersila and still require one crutch for long distances.

Interesting times indeed for Malaysia, talks of a new government have never been so widespread and talked about. Let's keep on praying for His will for this country. I heard a song by Planetshakers titled, 'Save Australia' once and i thought, 'What a nice prayer, the words were so apt, i wonder if Planetshakers would let me take the song and replace Australia with Malaysia'. Read an article about how it's easy to find a Chinese, Indian or Malay Hero. But it's hard to find a Malaysian hero. Some truths in that statement, a lot of us are filled with prejuidices and dissatisfaction towards one another. Most of us struggle to identify with one another at times too.

It's been a good 2 monthsish time of rejuvenation and self-discovery. Not to mention all the funky food i got to eat again. Instead of Chicken soup for the soul, i should write a book call 'Malaysian junk food for the soul'. Chpt 1, deep fried pork knuckles when gloomy coz the very sight of them would gross you out and you would chuckle at the thought of who is crazy enough to eat another animal's legs. 10minutes later, you're swallowing it down into your tummy. Chpt 2, eat nasi lemak with kari or banana leaf rice with beautiful curry till you lau sai to get the adrenaline rush to wash your sorrows away. Chpt 3, taufufa and gueylingko .....etc. u get the point. haha. Ooo, did i mention too that i also had the chance to check out the buka puasa stalls near my place. The scents were so refreshing. Beef rendang, ayam percik, ikan bakar...drools.

I return to Adelaide tonight with a sense of accomplishment. Mum kept telling me that this trip back home was to get my leg fixed and anything else was a bonus and i must say, i received a lot of bonuses. I told myself the main priorities for this trip back home was to just catch up with my family and friends and to get my leg fixed. I got more. I've learned things about myself again and have set new goals and priorities in my life (hopefully, they'll stay. haha).

I'm probably going to cry again tonight but oh well, haha, at least i've got a wheelchair and attendant to push me to the aeroplane.

hehehhehehhehehehhehehehehehehe.

I've got 3 papers to sit for next week, 8th, 9th and 12th. Would appreciate the support in praying. And there after, God-willing, the last semester.

Hopefully...

See you in Adelaide.

Happiness

2008-08-27T17:56:00.002+09:30

I just sat for my IELTS speaking test today. (For those interested, my other components of the test will be on this Saturday, 30th Aug from 8am.) One of the questions that i was asked was along the lines of, 'Do you think is sensible for someone to be happy all the time?'

I answered, 'Well, if i did not know sadness, i would not know happy and being happy all the time would not be any good.'

I thought it was an interesting question.

The examiner went on asking whether did i think people today are happy.

I know some Malaysians who are not. Not happy about this, that and a whole lot of stuff.

But i'm sure Malaysians at Permatang Pauh would be happy, or at least the majority are with Dato Seri Anwar's win. It's going to be very interesting to see what happens in Malaysia over the next few months. We just have to keep praying and trusting God.

Are you happy?

Random Ramblings

2008-08-19T06:55:00.017+09:30

Just took some photos and put them all up (not according to order),

Received a very interesting card from Adelaide. Thanks :) It really made my day.

Lil deco's in the hall at home.

Where I sometimes spend precious moments with Him in the hall at home.

Attended Bukit Bintang Old Boys Dinner.

Char siew pau and No mai kai

Guess what i found? They sell Bundaberg Ginger beer here for Rm 8.50. One of the 'pearls' that i discovered in Adelaide.

I'm going to wear you soon!!

The new fish pond

Sexy scars.

How do you say ligament in cantonese? Lee-Gah-Man?!?!!??!

Being a 'handicap' has privilleges. It's been an interesting journey moving around in crutches. You begin to realise that hey, not all shopping malls are equipped with disability-friendly facilities. Like for example, how are you going to open a toilet door when both your hands are on the crutches. Mind you, toilet doors are equipped with those auto swivel thing at the joint where it 'closes' itself when open. Go try. haha. Not many are considerate of your condition too. Got bumped around the other day. Really was annoyed. Thankfully, i was able to 'not fall'. Interesting enough, the mamak fellas and aunties and uncles at kopitiam and not to forget burmese workers in restaurant are more understanding of my situation compared to the common folk. Oh well, life goes on.. :)

Chong Wei lost. I guessed Malaysians were really looking to him to bring some joy in times of political stife and uncertainties. Almost everyday in the newspaper, there are articles reporting, Anti-Corruption Agency arrested so and so....Public dissatisfaction...and so on. A silver's still something to celebrate for and credit to him for going against the entire stadium of crazily LOUD people.

I'm beginning to move around at home without crutches already but still need one when i move long distance. And long distance means walking to shopping mall entrance from carpark. haha

I miss football. I miss leading my brothers in defending the goal. One of my favourite position in the field was either being the defensive midfielder or the sweeper. Breaking up attacking plays of the opposing team and starting our own attacking plays. Tactial stuffs. If you recall, i used to have my own footie team and we would go around challenging team and yours truly would of course be the one leading. Man, i dont know why but i have a sudden respect for Rio Ferdinand. The way he plays and leads. 11 more months. ish ish.

Going back to Adelaide on the 3rd of Sept and will arrive on the 4th.

At physio

2008-08-13T12:42:00.003+09:30

Guess where am I at now? haha.

I am currently in the middle of my physiotherapy session. How cool is that? They have free wireless internet at this place and i told myself, one day, i'm gonna bring my lappie and look cool over here. Today's the day. haha.

Not so cool anymore when you're in pain. I'm on this machine that bends your knee. I have been stuck around the 80 to 120 range the past few days. It hurts like crazy when its around 110ish. Happens coz of muscle stiffness. Ahh..110, 115.....aaaaaaaaa....cant scream in public. . . . ... ... .....

haha..cheap thrills that excites me. shiok sendiri.

I'm beginning to understand that this trip back home is purely for my leg and anything else that i get are bonuses. Bye bye pulau perhentian or redang or langkawi. I was really hoping for the opportunity to go for a short trip at one of the islands. Oh well....nasi kandar at kayu tonight.
:)

Lifesong

2008-08-04T00:09:00.003+09:30

[Amazing grace currently being played in the backgroud]

I thank God for movies like 'Amazing Grace'. I finally had the opportunity to watch the movie after wanting to watch it for oh-so-long but never really had the chance and time.

William Wilberforce or Wilby as mentioned by his wife in the movie interests me. To have something you are so passionate about and to give your whole life up for it is something very admirable and i shudder at the thought that He may do that with me too. Sometimes, i feel like i have 'closed the door' on Him to put desires in my heart for fear that it will consume me.

Interestingly enough, i just had a conversation with the Joker in Perth about our purposes on Earth. I know we are called to 'go forth and multiply', to 'go make disciples of all nations', to glorify God and to enjoy Him forever etc. We were talking more specifics.

Like being called to fight the oppression of human beings or something to that effect, or being a father (i've come to see that there's a calling in that too), etc.

Let's see what happens.

Isaiah 26:8 Yes, LORD, walking in the way of your laws, we wait for you;
your name and renown are the desires of our hearts.
9a My soul yearns for you in the night; in the morning my spirit longs for you.
----
Did i mention how much i love hymns? To come up with lines like, 'i was once blind but now i see' when one is blind. Wow. (from the original Amazing Grace by John Newton, go wiki him.hehe) Still, credit to Chris Tomlin for coming up with a remake of 'Amazing Grace' but there's always a financial side when songwriters today come up with songs. Don't get me wrong, i like Chris T and the stuffs that he has come up with. I believe He is also using people like him for His purposes.

I just love songs written from the heart, purely from one's individual life experiences with God and with no financial incentives and all that sorts.

I was talking to mum about it. Hymns, in general, will appeal to people with more life experiences as they have come to appreciation of what the authors really meant when they wrote what they wrote and it just gives more depth when singing it. Simply because, they understand and may have also gone through similar life experiences.

Pampered jokers like me, well, we need people like Chris T to come up remake of old hymns to appeal to our taste musically and hopefully, when 'caught' by the song, we will do our own search and appreciate the words used and thoughts suggested AND...

Worship Him.

:)

----
Ended up not going for Passion KL. I gave my ticket away. First was Hillsongs, now this. haha. Oh well...
----
Praise God. I can walk on one crutch now and have even tried limping around the house without crutches. I say limping as i still can't fully bend the knee so when without the crutch, i look like i'm hobbling or limping around. Bruises are also slowly disappearing away too. And yes, i hit 90 degrees already, did 100 actually yesterday :) Achieved my target to only use one crutch by this week. For the coming week, my target would be to hit the gyms. Let's see. Been pushing myself like crazy in physios.

3.33am

2008-08-02T05:02:00.002+09:30

Its 3.33 am and i'm awake. Been having trouble sleeping the past few days. Would only get a couple of hours sleep each night and they're not like like sleep sleep. Its like sleep, wake up, sleep, wake up, sleep, wake up.

One of the causative factors would be them muscle aches and discomfort all over my leg. Ish.

Stitches came off today. Something to be grateful for :)

Pushing on

2008-07-30T00:30:00.004+09:30

In light of my present sufferings, i am reminded of the Cross..yet again. I was grimacing in pain the other day as some machine was forcing my knees to bend and boy, do they hurt and i remembered the cross and what kind of pains He went through. It cannot be compared of course. It must have been incredibly painful for Him.

The picture above is the latest one on how my leg looks like. Swellings decreased already. Its much lighter now and im beginning to regain some strength there. Bruisings all over are from crazy physiotherapists who enjoy making you suffer.

haha.

It's from the excess bleeding from the op. But yea, these physiotherapists are real jokers man. They keep going, 'come on, push, push' or 'Today, doctor gave me license to make you suffer, muahahaha.' And us patients would be laughing at one another when one of us go through some excruciating exercises not knowing we are next. I was a victim.

I managed to hit 80 degrees yesterday without a machine. hehehe. so proud of myself. Then some aunty shouted from behind, 'ah boy ah...im already doing 70 and i just had my op couple days ago.'

potong stim man.

Pushing on today, my goal for the week, to rid of one crutch.

Did i mention, my new best friends are my crutches and they super cool looking brace i have to wear everytime i 'walk'. haha. And my new enemy is that stocking that i have to wear everyday to compress my veins and arteries to avoid DVT. They're soooo uncomfortable.

I am so grateful for the people around me. They have been so helpful. Bringing breakfast to bed for me, driving me around, helping me to shower...the list is endless.

Off to physio. See ya. Gonna try 90 today.

Down days

2008-07-23T15:27:00.002+09:30

I realised that there's going to be some up days and down days through this hard period of having only one mobile leg. Yesterday was a 'down' day and boy, was it 'down'.

sigh.

gotta find some mechanism to cheer me up when i hit rock bottom.

physio today was good. yay for me, i reached 40 degrees on my knee bends on the busted leg. haha. the old aunties and uncles are competing with one another. One of them's on 90 degrees already.

haha :)

Waasssaaapppp

2008-07-21T22:55:00.014+09:30

Pictures, in no particular order (not for the faint hearted, you have been warned :p)

Discharged on Sunday Afternoon. Had church with Father, Son and Holy Spirit on Hospital Bed :)

Right after the op, i was 'high' on some feel good drug.

Hospital jokers gave me frisbee as a free gift to motivate me. haha

Before ..

Hellllllooooooo world...

It has been an interesting week so far. Came back home to Klg on Tues night (15th of July), saw Doc on Wed, and had my first ever surgery on Friday which lasted for 4 hours. Thank God it went well. That was the easy part. haha. Hard part is the rehab and all the exercises which i must adhere to and also NO GAMES FOR 1 year. (maybe 9 months..hehe).

The staff was extremely professional. From the questions they asked to the way they handled themselves, i must say i was very impressed. Then again, the whole thing costs a bomb. They should be professional. haha.

Some interesting stories that i will not forget.

1. In the OT, i was the only male apart from the Doc who was operating and some other guy who helped carry me onto the table and all. So to distract my mind (the ladies could all see that i was nervous and all), they cracked random jokes like whtr i was attached or not and that most of the ladies there were single. But yea, they did their best to make sure i did not think about what was to come. Before i knew it, i heard someone say, 'injection coming in' and i felt the most excruciating pain on my back. I opted for spinal anaesthesia so that meant injection to the back. Best part was, the same voice then said, 'ooppss, i missed'. haha. Not her fault anyway, i was moving and all but the second one was straight on the spot. Right now, ive got 2 bruises on my back. Them jokers..haha. They pumped some drug into me and next thing i know, i was asleep. Mind was awake though, i could hear what they were talking but just could not respond. I was like in some semiconscious state.

And i think they injected some drug after the op to wake me up coz i woke up the moment i was wheeled into my room. Boy, was i hyper. They gave me some feel good drug too and i was literally 'high'. Some patients like that particular drug as it gives the same effect as alcohol minus the side effects. LOL. Was talking non stop to everyone and ate like a pig. I was thinking..that wasnt too bad. Few hours later, when the drug effects wore off and the anaesthesia lost its effect..haha..happy chinese new year man...pain like crazy....

2. Another incident, the morning after the op, i was taking a shower in the hospital toilet and i accidentally dropped my crutches. One of the nurse came running into the toilet to see whether i was alright. Yes, she saw me nude. haha. I was also wearing them backless gowns and i totally forgotten about it. Once when i was walking to the toilet, i was baring my bum bum to the whole ward. I had my disposable undies on of course but they had holes..i didnt realise until a nurse came n hold the gown for me at the back.

3. I got my leg hairs on my right leg shaved off.

yes, you must be laughing now. haha

On a serious note, i thank God for the people around me. I'm really limited in what i can do now. Getting into a car takes a llooonggg time. Going to toilet and getting in and out of bed leaves me breathless. God still provides. Like on Sunday, we didnt know how i was going to be transported home but thank God, a church uncle just came and offer his help with his van.

And really, this whole thing about the body of Christ and how one part affects the other. Its so true man. My knee affects my entire being now. It's uber inflamed now, all swollen up and it affects my mood and how i feel. Can be a bit depressing sometimes when you have to rely on people to help you even with the simplest stuff. And the pain....mum calls me big baby now oh well..hahha. Low threshold

And was reading P. Yancey's book on prayer and it described prayer as a total disregard of oneself and full dependance on God. Being in this condition that i am, I'm beginning to understand what it means to fully depend on Him.

Met new friends during physio today and suddenly had a fear. At 21, I'm having this already. If i dont look after it properly, whats going to happen when i hit 50.

Sigh.

Here It comes

2008-07-17T19:05:00.009+09:30

Spent the day with my mates today and then it became mate.. haha. It was good. Never had so much fun before with guitars.

Came back and pulled weeds and swept the floor. haha. Had no outdoor chores to do back in Adl.

I just found out that if i were to go for Spinal anaesthesia tmr, it would mean that they're going to stick some long needle into my spinal chord. happy chinese new year man....hahahha

I remember coming up with a list of things to do for my 21st yr on earth and the surgery was one of them and looks like its coming to pass...

time to go work my jiggy..

hehe

Thanks for praying

really appreciate the love and support

feeling a bit shy now. i might hv to be stripped naked except for that gown.

haha.

just had petai for dinner and eating durian now. I better not fart tmr in the op theater. If the doc faints, we'll know why....hahahhahahha

and no food from 8am tmr till potentially 8 pm.. ish

Home

2008-07-16T19:40:00.020+09:30

It's good to be home. :)

Some pictures of the past few weeks. It's funny. I was so used to smiling at everyone anytime someone passes but I guess, KL people aren't just as friendly. I mean, I'm sure when one asks, 'How do you do?', you would doubt whether does he/she really earnestly wants to know how are you doing? But i see it as a sign of politeness and hospitality. Oh well...

Some pics and updates

Sent out the M team to a place where they needed to go.

Had a good meal with the committee. First time ever experience at a 'poshy' Cina restaurant in Adelaide. Notice the gold coloured book where the bill came with.

Finished placement at Helping Hand Ingle Farm with a presentation to 3 chaps which was a interesting experience.

I had to borrow a projector and bring my own laptop. Imagine carrying those stuffs and traveling for close to 1.5 hours. That was what i had to go through almost everyday for 4 weeks.

We had Dr. Omar Djoeandy at OCF that night (11th July). He's one of our CONVENTION speakers this year and yes, we are truly blessed to have him take a session and also give us a taste of what is to come. Am so PUMPED to see what he has to share with us from God during CONVENTION. It was an incredible night. God really spoke so clearly to so many and of course, when the Spirit of God comes, something HAPPENS. He thanked me for leading worship that night saying that I did a good job in preparing the 'hearts' for the WORD through songs and sharing and also 'moments'. On my part, it sorta confirmed what has been on my heart the past few weeks.

John 12:32 But I, when I am lifted up from the earth, will draw all men to myself.

Truly when God is exalted, well....GREAT and AWESOME THINGS HAPPEN.

Spent time with the Chen's. haha. it was a good evening :)

Received a kau-kau power book to keep me company. :) Thank You.

Had Dimsum with what was left of the committee. haha

Waited for a bit for Parents at KLIA as the flight landed early.

Went to KL Sports Medical Centre to see a certain Doc for my knee.

And now, going for a surgery this Friday (18th July) and will be hospitalized for the most 2 days and on crutches for at least 2 weeks and physiotherapy for 6 weeks. We did an MRI again today and found out that I have some underlying problems too apart from my TORN ligament. We spent about RM1410 alone today on scans and consultation. I did an MRI, Xray and a Doppler to find for clots or possible clots from the long flight yesterday. CRaaazzzYYYYY. And another expected 30k for the op. Thank God for wise PARENTS who bought INSURANCE for silly ol' me. If you can see the admission letter, it says that I will be going for some lateral release.

Yup, underlying problems..

My Patella (knee cap) is not in place. Apparently, it's not sitting on top of my bones properly. It's something like the image above. Not so serious though, just slightly tilted. Docs gonna cut some stuffs and 'release' some stuffs to let it sit properly. The cause is some inflammation at the sides of the kneecap and also from the Chronic ACL injury. I think its going to be related with the plica resection.

Original position.

I will be going for some 'meniscus shaving too'. I apparently have a congenital problem call discoid meniscus. Thank God the meniscus is intact. Meniscus is the layer of thingy in between the bones. From the top view, its supposed to look like a C, but mine's something in between of a C and an O.

Mine is something like that, but it gives you a rough picture of what mine is. Docs gonna drill a bit off. If i don't fix it now, it will lead to scarring and more knee aches and yes, my knee aches were probably from the meniscus thingy.

I really want to be back for E night but i guess that might not be possible anymore. Haha. Rehabs gonna take about 6 weeks and with the Op happening this Friday. Potentially, i'll be out of action in OCF till Sept.

Prayer partners, I will be going in for surgery at 2.30pm this Friday at KL Sports Medical Centre. The surgery should lasts for 3 hours but can go up to 6 hours if Doc finds more problem.

Some holiday eh.

But oh well, i guess i can take the time to just REST and catch up on some good books. On the way back, i realised that the past 6 months or so has been like a blur to me. It's like i had no break since Dec 07. Had to study in Dec, placements in Jan, Classes in Feb till April, then exams, then back to back Electives, then placements. It was like i went back to Adelaide to run 4000kms and now im taking a breather.

Food has been good though.

Some thoughts

2008-06-30T20:11:00.007+09:30

Thought 1

I was at a dinner last Saturday night and there were more females than males and someone made a statement about it.

'Isn't that how it always is in Christian circles where there are more capable female leaders than male leaders?'

I spent the whole night trying to list out reasons as to why we see this trend not only Christian organizations but churches as well, or at least the ones that I have been exposed to.

Some of the reasons my mates and I came up with:

a. Guys take longer time to mature.

b. Guys are not given permission to be who they are. We feel insecure and sometimes require 'permission' or 'validation' of who we are.

c. We guys do not how to be intimate with God. Man to man?

Haha. What do you think?

Thought 2

Chung En's leaving for DTS YWAM in Perth this Sunday (Singapore on Saturday first) to experience greater things that God has prepared for Him. That means I won't be able to hang with him till i dont know when. Haha. Some people that God brings into your life you know are God-sent. He's one of them for me. And i'm just feeling down coz did not have enough time together the last time i was home and now that I'll be back in mid-July, He won't be there.

Philippians 2:4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.

You have indeed been watching my back this whole time and i just wanted to say thank you. You are meant for GREAT things.

Time to soar.

Thought 3

Random pictures from the weekend.

You will be surprised at how much stuffs was stuffed into the pants. Just shows how much space there was

I walked into a pole for the first time in my life without knowing. I was talking and looking away and did not see the pole. The picture was obviously taken after it happened. Just wanted something to remember it. Haha.

just realised i better do as much silly things as i can before i get to old and will be to embarassed to do it anymore.

Haha

You

2008-06-29T22:39:00.004+09:30

I just found out that dad's troponin T test (a marker test for blockages in the heart) showed that there was a 95% chance his heart had blockages and of course that would mean severe implications and when the angiogram (heart scan) was conducted, it showed that the heart was clear.

I woke up crying on Thursday night crying for obvious reasons and now I'm sobbing again at the miracle that has happened.

Thank You.

The Watchman

2008-06-28T10:36:00.004+09:30

The word of the Lord for today:

Isaiah 21:5-7

Prepare the table,

Set a watchman in the tower,

Eat and drink.

Arise, your princes,

Anoint the shield!

For thus has the Lord said to me:

"Go, set a watchman,

Let him declare what he sees."

And he saw a chariot with a pair of horsemen,

A chariot of donkeys, and a chariot of camels,

And he listened earnestly with great care.

God is coming soon. Are we listening to Him earnestly?

Are we being a watchman?

Dad complaint of chest pains on Wed and was admitted into ICU. He went for an angiogram yesterday and thankfully, there are no blockages in his heart. God-willing, discharged later today in the afternoon.

Praise the Lord, O my Soul.

I just wanted to say thank you to all the saints that have been praying with me.

Random gratefulness

2008-06-23T00:03:00.002+09:30

Something that the Housemate and Joker came up with. Haha. See, i've got such lovely friends.

Just completed the first week of a 4 weeks placement in Helping Hand, an aged care facility in Ingle Farm. It takes an hour and a half to get there and another hour and half to return. Nutss..

I'm doing a project for them whereby i'll be looking into all the residents kidney function and their meds list and highlight those who are on renally cleared drugs and come up with a list of things to watch out for the nurses. It dosen't sound too big a deal but oh well, at least i can contribute something back to the local community. I think i might have to go in depth a bit on the drugs too or something like that.

Oh, did i mention, it's winter already. I absolutely love blowing out 'white smoke' from the mouth or nose but i get so annoyed by baju which are still wet even after a cycle in the dryer. Ish.

Woohoo, 3 more weeks and i'm back in dusty ol Klang. But wont be able to see the handsome fella whos Perth-bound. Sobs.

I'm horrible at remembering important dates; forgot her birthday. Sorry.

Yes, as you can see, these are just random fleeting thoughts that are currently running in my mind.

Someone shared with me this.

Do you struggle with pride? How do we deal with it? What's our attitude towards pride?

Phillipians 2

5Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
6Who, being in very nature^[a] God,
      did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
7but made himself nothing,
      taking the very nature^[b] of a servant,
      being made in human likeness.
8And being found in appearance as a man,
      he humbled himself
      and became obedient to death—
         even death on a cross!
9Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
      and gave him the name that is above every name,
10that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
      in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
11and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,
      to the glory of God the Father

A lifestyle of worship to Him would definitely help in keeping us humble.

On the bus the other day, I saw a mother who was struggling to keep her 2 young ones in check. They were literally crawling all over her and running around the place and she had so much trouble to get them on the bus and just to get them seated. She wasn't angry with them or shouting at them, but instead she was laughing and smiling all the way and joking with them. It was like the 3 of them were in their own world and they were contented. I was just brought to the past and had an image of Mum having me and doing her Masters at the same time. I must have been such a pain in the a#@$. Haha. Yet, i can also imagine her laughing and smiling and well, raising me up to be a man after His own heart. I still do crawl all over her at times and be a pain in the a#$%. Not to mention Pop who push me up and down in the sarong. I just hope to make Pop and Her proud. Someone told me that we Wong's are blessed to have such a heritage from our parents and I'm beginning to see that and understand that.

I am grateful for the amazing opportunities that i have been presented to mix with other cultures.

I spent almost the whole of last Thursday with an Australian and a Vietnamese.

I kicked the ball around the field with a Madagascan and a Korean.

I made friends with a Phillipino father of 2 young kids who has a heart for university students.

I had a free consultation with a Singaporean Physiotherapy student.

Not to forget, ALL THE BEAUTIFUL LOOKING MALAYSIANS. hehe. yes, we are a beautiful group of people.

It's not natural for me to open up just like that to new people. If you know me, I'm more of a shy person and my defence mechanism always comes into place when meeting new people. I go all reserved and into my own world. Trying to bypass that first mechanism too and slowly working through it.

I just told one of them, good friends = people who you absolutely love and adore and at the same time, you want to strangle them and kick their backside because they can become such a pain in the a#$%. haha

Forgive me for referring to the other end of the human body but i have been having problems there but thank God, its getting better. Haha.

God has been slowly directing me to things He wants me to do. Right now, it's be patient and wait upon Him.

I'm grateful to be Yours.

PIctures and such

2008-06-09T17:19:00.010+09:30

I discovered a new way to wear my scarf to protect my ears from the blistering wing. haha

Uber- attractive socks.

Campus Prayer outing by the River Torrens.

He moved mightily.

Thank You.

Lunch at Aunty Lai Wah's with some leaders and friends. There were more aunties and uncles, just that i only remembered to take a picture when most of them left.

On the way home to good ol' North Adelaide

I dropped my guitar with the capo clipped on the top. Heart stopped beating for that moment. Sigh. The strap wasn't hooked properly and it just slipped off. My capo's slightly twisted now.

I was frantically searching the whole house a couple of days ago for my house keys before going out.

Lo and behold, it was in my pocket. Ish

I remember days when mum would be looking around for the house keys or car keys and asking us all to help look and we would later then find it in her hand bag or pocket.

I am my mother's son. Haha.

Just finished Wild at Heart by John Eldredge and finishing The Way of the Wild heart ( A Map for the masculine journey) soon.

Learning Lots.

Aquaman

2008-06-04T21:40:00.003+09:30

I just have to make a mention of this.

I got this t-shirt from Nad as a birthday gift.

Everyone's saying, 'Ah-Kua Man!!!!'

Ah-Kua = sissy in Cantonese or Hokkien i think, or something along those lines.

haha. :)

Loving the t-shirt tho'

Thanks again, Nad nad

Just found out that petrol price back home has gone up. Rm2.70 per litre.

Interesting times we're living in.

Psalm 46

2008-06-04T00:57:00.000+09:30

Psalm 46

v10 Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!

Why does the psalmist tell the reader that God is God? I believe because when in doubt and in turmoil, we as humans tend to forget that God is God. We think we are god and that’s why we blame ourselves for ‘losing control’ when things don’t work in our favour, hence, the unnecessary worrying and frustration. I’m not saying don’t worry but we have to see things from His perspective.

It’s interesting that in verse 2, the author uses ‘earth’ and ‘mountains’, two symbols of stability.

…..Even though the earth be removed, And though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea; …..

We all have something that we perceive to be our ‘earth’ and ‘mountains’. It could be our position/status, acceptance by the people around us, the ability to be wanted, our parents, our ability to do well in exams and such. When they are ‘removed’ or ‘carried into the midst of the sea’, what happens to us?

It’s interesting to note that the author uses negative words in the following verses: v3 mountains shake, v6 nations raged, kingdoms were moved, earth melted, v8 desolations in the earth, v9 wars cease to the end of the earth;..breaks the bow and cuts the spear in two; . . burns the chariots in the fire.

And suddenly,

‘v11 Be still . . …

Psalms was written in a poetic way, like a song.

You can feel the buildup leading to verse 11 and suddenly,

‘Be still…..

And it ends with a ‘!’

He is exalted indeed.

When all seems lost and you do not know what is going around or what is happening,

Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!

It’s all about Him, all for His glory.

Psalm 46

To the Chief Musician. A Psalm of the sons of Korah. A Song for Alamoth.

1 God is our refuge and strength,

A very present help in trouble.

2 Therefore we will not fear,

Even though the earth be removed,

And though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea;

3 Though its waters roar and be troubled,

Though the mountains shake with its swelling. Selah

4 There is a river whose streams shall make glad the city of God,

The holy place of the tabernacle of the Most High.

5 God is in the midst of her, she shall not be moved;

God shall help her, just at the break of dawn.

6 The nations raged, the kingdoms were moved;

He uttered His voice, the earth melted.

7 The LORD of hosts is with us;

The God of Jacob is our refuge. Selah

8 Come, behold the works of the LORD,

Who has made desolations in the earth.

9 He makes wars cease to the end of the earth;

He breaks the bow and cuts the spear in two;

He burns the chariot in the fire.

10 Be still, and know that I am God;

I will be exalted among the nations,

I will be exalted in the earth!

11 The LORD of hosts is with us;

The God of Jacob is our refuge. Selah

Thank You

2008-06-02T21:31:00.004+09:30

It's been a week since i turned 21.

haha.

I just wanted to take this opportunity to thank every SINGLE ONE of you that made this day EXTRA SPECIAL and MEMORABLE for me. It really was a blast!!!!!!!! All the sms', emails, e-cards, calls, sabo'SSS (plural!!!!hahahahhahaha...i had fun tho'), birthday cards, PRESENTS!!!!!, hugs, wishes, simple gestures, efforts put into thinking of what to buy for MEEEE or what to do and so much more.

Thank You.

It really made this whole-turning-21-thing more special and memorable for me.

Most of all, i thank You, My Heavenly Father for seeing me through the past 20 years of my life and i look forward to the next 20 years with much anticipation and excitement for all that You have in store for me.

Time to be a man.

haha

Food for thought

2008-06-02T21:26:00.002+09:30

Lessons for Youth Ministries

Why youth ministry workers

drop out

By AJITH FERNANDO

ONE of the sad facts that any youth ministry faces is the number of people who were active in God's work in their youth who are now not active in service or completely backslidden. Youth for Christ (YFC) has had to face this fact and admit with sorrow that many who were active with us in their youth are no longer walking with the Lord.

I have several things to say about this sad phenomenon.

1. When we are so busy with our programmes in YFC it is easy to let the major aspects of discipling be related almost exclusively to the youth programme so that we do not prepare the young people adequately for life in society. In theory YFC leaders are always supposed to keep this balance, but we do not always succeed as the urgent demands of programmes keep detracting us from some other important aspects of discipling. We must labour for real, comprehensive balance. And those of us who are leaders have to really push our staff to ensure that this happens.

2. While the disciplines of community life are a very important aspect of Christian nurture we have to have as equally or even more important the developing of a Christian mind. I think often our teaching is more exhortational and devotional rather than doctrinal. I do not mean doctrinal in a dry sense, but doctrinal in that we teach our people to approach everything theologically – using the categories of the biblical worldview. It is very easy for youth groups to be deficient here.

3. Many young people are attracted to YFC because it meets some of their felt needs. It gives them a community where they are warmly affirmed and accepted. They like to have fun with a group of peers that regards them as equals. They want to be involved in an ideological cause which helps them to give expression to the rebellion they have against the hypocrisy they see in the adult generation.

Most people, whatever their age may be, come to Christ to meet a need. But they stay on with Christ when they are convinced that He is the truth. This is why Peter said the disciples will not leave Christ after they saw many of those who followed Him leaving Him. They knew that He had "the words of eternal life" (John 6:68).

Many youths will mimic the Christian rituals that form a part of the YFC programme without making the transition from being need seekers to truth discoverers. Such have little resources to combat the challenges they will face from the world outside once they leave the security of the YFC community. This is why we must never be content only because we have large numbers in our youth groups. We must labour to find the most effective ways of giving them "the whole counsel of God"; ways that will enable the truth of the Gospel to penetrate their innermost beings.

4. While I cannot prove this statistically, I can say from observation during my 31 years in youth ministry that those young people who were led by a person who honestly believed that the YFC phase was a transitory stage in their lives had a better chance of going on with Christ after their youth years. Then the great aim of the leader would be to ensure that the youth under their care are happily settled and living for God in family, church and society – not just in the youth group. While the YFC programme does take a lot of time, this kind of leader would ensure that YFC prepares the youth they disciple for a healthy life in church, family and society.

These youth will have learned to think Christianly about church, home and society long before they get bored with youth programmes. Most young people will get bored with youth programmes and move on to another place of activity. Only some will sense a call to serve youth and remain within the YFC programme as volunteers and staff. We must fashion our organisational culture in such a way as to view as a great victory the departure of a person away from active involvement in YFC to church involvement.

5. For a para-church youth evangelistic organisation like ours, sending people we reach into a local church is a basic aspect of our call. But this principle applies to church youth groups too. Young people will get involved in the youth group for some years and then they will lose their interest in the programme because it is geared to people of a younger age. By then the truth that this person's permanent home is in the wider church should have been drilled into his or her soul. They should have been prepared to go into the outside world after some cosy years in the warm protection of the caring peer group in the youth programme.

Yet often church youth workers are guilty of fostering an exclusivistic attitude within their youth group. Often we encounter attitudes like the following: "We are more spiritual than these dead adults"; "Our worship and music is not boring like theirs"; "We are more committed, more geared to mission." When such youth pass the age of involvement in the youth group, they probably will not have a positive attitude towards the church. With the numerous challenges of young adulthood, such as establishing oneself in one's career and adjusting to married life, they could end up neglecting church attendance.

Leaders must get sense of importance from God …

Not from the people they lead

6. Most of us leaders are insecure people. We must be aware of this and strive to get our security and sense of importance from God and not from the people we lead. An insecure youth leader could foster an environment in which the youth adore him or her to the exclusion of other authority figures like parents and adult church leaders. A good leader would use his or her influence with the youth to encourage them to respect and love their parents and adult leaders.

An insecure leader could thrive on being hero-worshipped. This could be a very dangerous attitude. If those who adore the leader are from the opposite sex, a very unhealthy relationship could develop. Without knowing it the relationship could turn sexual. The relationship turns physical only much later. But the early stages of an affair could be developing when the adoration of the young person unconsciously becomes – to the youth worker – a personal conquest of the heart of the young person. Often the youth worker is viewed as a father or mother, which makes the relationship look very harmless. Psychologists are calling such relationships "emotional affairs" and there is a growing body of literature about this. Gradually the desire for conquest is extended to the body also, and the result is a physically sexual relationship.

All of us leaders must always be on guard that we never get from others the kind of affirmation we should get only from God and our spouses.

7. One of the best ways to avoid the youth work developing an exclusivistic attitude vis-à-vis the rest of the church is for a senior church worker like the senior pastor to have a warm and friendly attitude towards the youth worker and his or her ministry. The leader could become the father or mother whom this insecure youth worker never really had. And in that way the youth worker could develop the confidence and security which reduce the risk of thriving unhealthily on the adoration of the youth. If the senior pastor shows up at several youth programmes; if the youth know that he really enjoys seeing the young people having fun and laughs heartily at their jokes; if he is known to be the advocate of the youth before the leadership of the church, then there is a much greater chance of the youth developing a positive attitude towards the church.

8. I have seen many people who dropped out of YFC coming back to Christ and to heavy involvement in churches much later, sometimes after a decade or more in the wilderness. I often discover these people when I go to preach in churches. Their warmth towards YFC and what they say about their YFC days shows that what they learned in YFC had not been completely obliterated. Something made them seek involvement in a church or Christian group. That triggered a return to active Christian involvement. What seems to have happened was that the truths that were hidden in their hearts but suppressed during the rebellious years had resurfaced and come to life. Of course, it is the Holy Spirit who revitalises these dormant truths.

So let me tell younger youth workers not to be overly discouraged when youth fall away. We must grapple with the failure and ask where we went wrong, and what we should do to minimise the chances of youth dropping out. But if we have faithfully given them "the whole counsel of God" (Acts 20:27), we can keep hoping and praying for the day when these lapsed Christians return to Christ.

Dr Ajith Fernando is a Bible teacher, author, Methodist Local Preacher and National Director of Youth for Christ in Sri Lanka.

QUOTE:

'Most people, whatever their age may be, come to Christ to meet a need. But they stay on with Christ when they are convinced that He is the truth. This is why Peter said the disciples will not leave Christ after they saw many of those who followed Him leaving Him. They knew that He had "the words of eternal life" (John 6:68).'

DR AJITH FERNANDO

QUOTE:

INSECURE LEADERS

'An insecure youth leader could foster an environment in which the youth adore him or her to the exclusion of other authority figures like parents and adult church leaders. An insecure leader could thrive on being hero-worshipped.'

Heads up

2008-05-22T17:27:00.004+09:30

Haha

I'll be doing a lot of running this coming weekend.

Pictures

2008-05-11T17:52:00.009+09:30

Thank You.

Jeremiah 31:16-17

This is what the LORD says:

"Restrain your voice from weeping and your eyes from tears, for your work will be rewarded, " declares the LORD,

"They will return from the land of the enemy. So there is hope for your future,"

declares the LORD.

"Your children will return to their own land."

You reign

2008-05-05T00:09:00.002+09:30

I sit here having mixed emotions.

I had an interesting day today, made some kick-ass nasi lemak with my boy, Mr Win-win (our second attempt and i must say it's better than the first!!!) and kicked the ball around in the nearby field with the Keasberry's, Fu Tian, Win-win and of course, DanDan. Thankfully, there wasn't any repercussions. And i hope it stays that way.

Today has been an interesting day today. I've learnt that i can harbour sin in my heart and not let it go. Hey, but then again, isn't that like what i learn everyday?haha. But yea, today was more of a specific sin.

I'm beginning to see how taking such a huge responsibility in OCF in my first year in Adelaide may have some problems. I'm still not familiar with some of the ways how things work and i'm so compelled to follow what others do. But still, i know sometimes God has placed me here for a reason.

But still, I am fearful, fearful that everything may crumble. The people around me are getting stretched and most of them are facing problems and i am so compelled to dive in to hold everyone together. To help.

I feel so helpless.

My sister (how i am so much thankful to God for her) sent me this song below. I was just checking out the lyrics. And was reminded again about a short sharing i heard last night by Louie Giglio that Christ holds everything. I just flipped to Colossians and i noticed the headings of chapters 1, 2,and 3. 'Their faith in Christ, Preeminence in Christ, Reconciled in Christ, Sacrificial service for Christ, not philosophy but Christ, not legalism but Christ, not carnality but Christ." It's all about Christ. Him and Him only.

I'm in this position again where i acknowledge that You reign over everything, over this uni, this centre, this city, this state, this country, this earth, this universe. You reign.

I'm surrendering everything to You. This ministry, this life, this body, this heart, myself. It's all about You.

What could stand before You
As You chose to embrace
A cross so undeserved You took for me
The weight of sin upon You
When You offered Your life
As You walked the streets of men
With fading strength

How could we live but not see
Your sacrifice
Your glory

You reign, You reign
Over everything Lord, You reign
With power, and justice divine
Over everything Lord, You reign

What was Your last thought
As You drew Your last breath
Where the victory was Yours for us to see
And all will know the truth
As we live by Your grace
Every praise to You alone

See now the King of Glory
Love of God become my calling
Father I surrender all I am to You forever

A change in perception

2008-04-27T13:22:00.004+09:30

Some say autumn is a time of emo-ness. I can't help but agree more. Leaves falling down, dark

clouds, leaves changing colour . . the works. And all you want to do is just cuddle up in bed.

It can be really draining if i allow the weather to dictate my emotions. It's just so unpredictable, the weather. And so, a change in perception is needed. :)

We kickstarted GYM (GuY's Ministry) in OCF last Saturday. Haha. Thank God for birth-ing this ministry. Hopefully, it will be the start of great things to come. Actually, i know it is going to be the start of great things to come.

The sister's from AU did such an AMAZING job in surprising us with cupcakes, cookies and buns and lil exquisite-looking gourmet thing-y. It was wrapped so nicely. Regretted not taking more pictures. We had cinnamon buns that really tasted like they were from that Cinnabon (or something like that name) from home too. Credit to the brothers also in stepping up in preparing lunch for us too. If you are reading this and i missed the chance to thank you, well, THANK YOU!!!!! I mean, personally, seeing sister and brothers coming together supporting one another, it really lifted my spirits up after such a long and tiring week. But i must admit, we guys still need some work in supporting our fellow sisters still. We'll get there though. hehe. I must say that we have improved though.

Seeing the guys praying for one another and the sisters surprising us, it almost made me teared. Haha. The unity of the body of Christ is something which should never be taken for granted. And I am reminded again that Christ is the one that holds us together and unites us.

beeeaaaaauuuuttiiiful

What defines me

2008-04-17T09:28:00.003+09:30

Psalm 37:4 Delight yourself also in the LORD, and He shall give you the desires of your heart.

The word 'also' reminds me to read the verse before.

Psalm 37:3 Trust in the LORD, and do good; Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.

It made me read the title of the Psalm again.

'The Heritage of the Righteous and the Calamity of the Wicked.'

Psalm 36:7b How precious is Your lovingkindess, O God!

In the midst of my conversations with a couple of my friends, i was asked, 'Is there anything more to your life?' Apart from God, family and friends. I'm afraid no. Haha. A rather boring person i am? LOL. Well, i will let you be the judge but i know of some who would say otherwise.

It was a good day yesterday. Got a text from my sister, 'Hello ko, how was your paper today?' That brought the widest grin to my mouth. Just in the morning before, He reminded me of the verse in Psalm 37:4

Beautiful.

Just want to say a big thanks to all the big che ches i've never had and mates and brothers and sisters in Christ around the world who have been praying and will continue praying with me. Apart from the excitement that Jesus is walking with me in this journey, the fact that I have you walking alongside me also just makes me want to jump around in joy.

much love and thanks,

Jinnie Babe.

haha

1 down, 1 to go

2008-04-14T21:25:00.004+09:30

The advantage of being physically alone is that you can spend more time spiritually with Him. This morning was a special. While talking to Him, sometimes so much so that i fail to listen but this morning, thankfully I listened, i was reminded again of the Cross.

Mark 2: 9 Which is easier, to say that to the paralytic, 'Your sins are forgiven you,' or to say, 'Arise, take up your bed and walk?'

Thank You.

Done with ethics. AP looms.

Silence

2008-04-12T20:57:00.007+09:30

If I'm not mistaken, this would be the first night i'll be all alone. Most of the 'kakis' went off for ECamp, my heart's there too but i'm forcing it to be HERE. EXAMS approaching. RAWR!!! haha

It's interesting be all alone (you tend to talk to yourself a lot) but i was reminded I'm not. I've got a Housemate that's everywhere and man, i've loving life having Him by my side. I can't imagine what life would be without Him. Plus, i don't really have to talk to myself now. :)

Decided to cook myself a good meal for dinner.

Haha. Very first attempt at making Nohmaikai (actually, was just going to cook some fried dark rice, recipe from housemate LeeLihWei but ended up becoming 'nohmaikai' probably due to too much water).