At the threshold of a new era

If any of you, like me, used to watch TV3 at 6pm back in Malaysia, you would recognize the title of this aptly-named post as a familiar name of a popular Hong Kong series. man, I can't even remember what it was all about but i remembered watching it diligently everyday not understanding a single thing the characters were saying but just reading the malay subtitles.

And so, i find myself really in a very interesting position. I'm at the brink of another chapter in my life. After studying for a bit at the Uni library today, i decided to take a walk home instead of the usual bus. (also, i missed the free shuttle service from the city to my suburb..hah) But yea, used to walk home from uni, takes about 30-40mins and i really enjoyed it. Haven't had the chance to do it regularly since the surgery though. And yes, i sometimes enjoy long walks, especially when the birdies are flying around singing, sun is shining, flowers are blooming and the guys are playing some good football at the nearby field. (i can't waittt...haha)

From starting Uni in a lil place call Sepang Institute of Technology to coming over to the University of South Australia..it really has been a journey. As i look back, there were times where i really did not like where i was in life, i really was impatient with how long i was taking to learn some of the things, how things were around me and not to mention all the moments when i wondered boy, am i really doing the right thing and things like, man, is this really me? (yes, i used to struggle A LOT with my self-esteem and self-identity, i would think that a person would finally be rid of all these struggles come 21 but i guess i can be wrong). 

I've come to see that God really does not make mistakes. Every single experience that i have went through, every single question that i asked and pondered on, every single person that i have met, every single classes i went for, this course that i am in and studying for (every single girl that i have had a crush on..haha..yes.even that!!!) ....EVERYTHING!!!!! had a purpose. Whether it being life-changing, character-building, emotionally-challenging... It had a pupose! I will not be who I am today if anyone of those experiences was not there. When I'm not doing anything, i can end up thinking a lot and i realized too every single thoughts played out in my mind has an impact. I guess i'm beginning to see how everything is a means to an end. (used to think that i was in the wrong course but i've realized that this is for me as it helped deal with some of the issues that i have been struggling with)

God is Faithful. . . . even when we are not.

I wrote the following in my blog description last year and i called it 'Home alone'. Home alone refers to this time of my life where i feel like i have been 'thrown into the lion's den'; everything that i once held so dear at home have been 'temporarily' removed from me and i need to learn to how to 'live' all over again. So,I'm hoping that maybe i will go 'home' changed...for the better, i hope. God Bless.

And i feel that a new season is beginning in my life which led to the new blog title.

Sojourn of a Pilgrim.

I look ahead and i see the one thousand and one ways of how things now can transpire and how it may affect me. I feel so grateful because i know that He is in control. I really feel His peace guarding my heart (Philippians 4:7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus). He is really building me up and moulding me to be more like Him. I sometimes dream that i will one day first be a missionary and then end working in church leadership but i've come to realized that i am a missionary NOW and also a priest NOW. (1 Pet 2:9 But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light) side note: i just realized that we are priests so that we can praise Him, again another reminder to me that this life is all about Him.

Yes, i still have a heart for my home, Malaysia but i'm beginning to have a more global perspective to where God may be calling me to. (maybe mission work in a foreign land first and then church in Malaysia?haha) and of course, things like these are HUGE and beyond me right now (i may end up doing something totally different, who knowss..) but I am His and He knows me better than i know myself. He knows what excites me and what I am created for.

Christianitytoday did a survey among some American pastors recently. The question put forward was 'is the Kingdom of God a present reality, future reality or both?' 37% said future, 20% said present whilst 33% said it was both. Interestingly, 58% of them said that they believed the kingdom of God is a future reality 10 years ago. I believe that the Kingdom of God is both but i may be wrong (haven't did much research on it yet, but will get to it one day) but the point I'm making is that there is also a shift in paradigm amongst the Church today. Whether for good or bad i dont know yet but i can only pray that His will be done with His bride.

And i ask Him now to see where i fit in His great scheme of things and what does He want me to do.

Aunty Mei Lin emailed me a devo from 'Our daily bread' and the following is an excerpt from it.

F. B. Meyer said, “What a chapter might be written of God’s delays! It is the mystery of the art of educating human spirits to the finest temper of which they are capable. What searchings of heart, what analyzings of motives, what testings of the Word of God, what upliftings of soul. . . . All these are associated with those weary days of waiting, which are, nevertheless, big with spiritual destiny.”  — David H. Roper

Be still, My child, and know that I am God!
Wait thou patiently—I know the path you trod.
So falter not, nor fear, nor think to run and hide,
For I, thy hope and strength, am waiting by thy side. —Hein

And the Spirit comes

HELP ME BELIEVE
Take me back to the time
When I was maybe eight or nine
And I believed
When Jesus walked on waters blue
And if He helped me, I could too
If I believed
Before rationale, analysis and systematic thinking
Robbed me of a sweet simplicity
When wonders and when mysteries
Were far less often silly dreams
And childhood fantasies
Help me believe'
Cause I don't want to miss any miracles
Maybe I'd see much better by closing my eyes
And I would shed this grownup skin I'm in
To touch an angel's wing
And I would be free
Help me believe
When mustard seeds made mountains move
A burning bush that spoke for You was good enough
When manna fell from heavens high
Just because You told the sky to open up
Am I too wise to recognise that everything uncertain
Is certainly a possibility?
When logic fails my reasoning
And science crushes underneath
The weight of all that is unseen
Help me believe'
Cause I don't want to miss any miracles
Maybe I'd see much better by closing my eyes
And I would shed this grownup skin I'm in
To touch an angel's wing
And I would be free
Help me believe
When someone else's education
Plays upon my reservations
I'm the first to cave, I'm the first to bleed
If I abandon all that seeksTo make my faith informed and chic
Could You, would You show Yourself to me?
Help me believe'
Cause I don't want to miss any miracles
Maybe I'd see much better by closing my eyes
And I would shed this grownup skin I'm in
To touch an angel's wing
And I would be free

Help me believe

SMALL ENOUGH
Oh, GREAT GOD, BE SMALL ENOUGH TO HEAR ME NOW
THERE WERE TIMES WHEN I WAS CRYING
FROM THE DARK OF DANIEL'S DEN
AND I HAVE ASKED YOU ONCE OR TWICE
IF YOU WOULD PART THE SEA AGAIN
BUT TONIGHT I DO NOT NEED A FIERY PILLAR IN THE SKY
JUST WANNA KNOW YOU'RE GONNA HOLD ME IF I START TO CRY
OH, GREAT GOD, BE SMALL ENOUGH TO HEAR ME NOW
OH, GREAT GOD, BE CLOSE ENOUGH TO FEEL YOU NOW
THERE HAVE BEEN MOMENTS WHEN I COULD NOT
FACE GOLIATH ON MY OWN
AND HOW COULD I FORGET WE'VE MARCHED AROUND
OUR SHARE OF JERICHOS
BUT I WILL NOT BE SETTING OUT A FLEECE FOR YOU TONIGHT
JUST WANNA KNOW THAT EVERYTHING WILL BE ALRIGHT
OH GREAT GOD, BE CLOSE ENOUGH TO FEEL YOU NOW
ALL PRAISE AND ALL HONOR BE
TO THE GOD OF ANCIENT MYSTERIES
WHOSE EVERY SIGN AND WONDER TURN THE PAGES OF OUR HISTORY
BUT TONIGHT MY HEART IS HEAVY
AND I CANNOT KEEP FROM WHISPERING THIS PRAYER
"ARE YOU THERE?"
AND I KNOW YOU COULD LEAVE WRITING ON THE WALL
THATS JUST FOR ME
OR SEND WISDOM WHILE I'M SLEEPING,
LIKE IN SOLOMAN'S SWEET DREAMS
BUT I DON'T NEED THE STRENGTH OF SAMSON
OR A CHARIOT IN THE END
JUST WANT TO KNOW THAT YOU STILL KNOW HOW MANY HAIRS
ARE ON MY HEAD
OH GREAT GOD, BE SMALL ENOUGH TO HEAR ME NOWh, GREAT GOD, BE SMALL ENOUGH TO HEAR ME NOW
THERE WERE TIMES WHEN I WAS CRYING
FROM THE DARK OF DANIEL'S DEN
AND I HAVE ASKED YOU ONCE OR TWICE
IF YOU WOULD PART THE SEA AGAIN
BUT TONIGHT I DO NOT NEED A FIERY PILLAR IN THE SKY
JUST WANNA KNOW YOU'RE GONNA HOLD ME IF I START TO CRY
OH, GREAT GOD, BE SMALL ENOUGH TO HEAR ME NOW
OH, GREAT GOD, BE CLOSE ENOUGH TO FEEL YOU NOW
THERE HAVE BEEN MOMENTS WHEN I COULD NOT
FACE GOLIATH ON MY OWN
AND HOW COULD I FORGET WE'VE MARCHED AROUND
OUR SHARE OF JERICHOS
BUT I WILL NOT BE SETTING OUT A FLEECE FOR YOU TONIGHT
JUST WANNA KNOW THAT EVERYTHING WILL BE ALRIGHT
OH GREAT GOD, BE CLOSE ENOUGH TO FEEL YOU NOW
ALL PRAISE AND ALL HONOR BE
TO THE GOD OF ANCIENT MYSTERIES
WHOSE EVERY SIGN AND WONDER TURN THE PAGES OF OUR HISTORY
BUT TONIGHT MY HEART IS HEAVY
AND I CANNOT KEEP FROM WHISPERING THIS PRAYER
"ARE YOU THERE?"
AND I KNOW YOU COULD LEAVE WRITING ON THE WALL
THATS JUST FOR ME
OR SEND WISDOM WHILE I'M SLEEPING,
LIKE IN SOLOMAN'S SWEET DREAMS
BUT I DON'T NEED THE STRENGTH OF SAMSON
OR A CHARIOT IN THE END
JUST WANT TO KNOW THAT YOU STILL KNOW HOW MANY HAIRS
ARE ON MY HEAD
OH GREAT GOD, BE SMALL ENOUGH TO HEAR ME NOW

I thank God that He is with me even through this. Was going through some self-defeating thoughts while studying in the quiet area in the library and didnt know what to do but just to pray.

And His Spirit came.

Was led to these 2 songs above by Nichole Nordeman. The lyrics really expresses my heart and what I'm going through. Was also then reminded of an incident when we as a family were struggling together during Ahma's battle with her sickness. She was very sick and i didnt know why but one morning i got up and found this verse 1Thessa 5:16-18 in my Bible, wrote it on a piece of paper and stuck it on the stairs so that mum would see it the first thing she got up...coz i was too shy to tell her. was very young and shy then..i think i still am. :)

16Be joyful always; 17pray continually; 18give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

Thank You

Childhood memories

Childhood comes once in a lifetime but the memories stays forever.

-Daniel Lee (7th November 2008)

Woke up this morning and was recalling with The Housemate our childhood experiences. It's always good to reminisce and see how wonderful God has been to us.

-Mum had to always carry my bag for me and walk with me all the way to my class when i was in Standard 1 and i think she had to do it till Standard 3. I remember when i was in Standard 1, mum had to always be at the classroom door or at least the canteen to pick me up. If she wasn't there, i would go throw a tantrum and cry like really really bad. There was once i went berserk and my classmates had to go call her to come personally to pick me up from the classroom. Haha. She told me later how embarassed she was.

-One of the days in primary school i would never forget was when mum came to pick me up from school and she said that her colleague who went to UK for holidays got me what i wanted. My first ever official Man Utd jersey with my first official Man Utd football magazine. I was grinning from ear to ear. That really cheered me up. She didn't know that just before she came, i had a bad encounter with some bullies. All the fear went away went i heard what she said :)

-Another day i would never forget was when i came to school one day and my friends came and told me, 'wei jin, u passed PTS (some exam which if u passed, you could skip std 4)'. how i only wished i could be scoring those kind of results now. But yea, the thing about it that really made me remember it was that the discipline teacher then, Puan Lee said that those who cleared that exam had to donate RM1,000 to the school PIBG. I was like..aiyo..how laaaaa??????

-Ah Ma used to make really good milos and butter toast with sugars. man..i miss her.

-i remember wanting to buy adidas predator football boots so that i could look like David Beckham. I even bought brylcream to centre part my hair. 

-I looked forward to Daddy's return from overseas coz he would get me all these transformers and also Tamiya cars with spare parts. i feel so bad now for not keeping them properly.

-I remember sitting down with Dad in the old house cutting up bamboo trees and making model planes with them. We used rubber bands to hold them together. I also remember playing football once with Dad. He's always very busy with work but that one day when he played with me, i will never forget.

-I remember being forced to eat these really yucky vit c chewable tablets and i would always hide it under my tongue and would then later spit it out into the toilet bowl and flush it away. Not to mention hiding the cane so that our parents couldn't find it.

-I remember telling mum one afternoon that Sherny and me would go mop the kitchen for her. (she trained us to mop floor by going down on all fours and using clothes to wipe the floor) Sherny and i used all the distilled water that we collected to mop the floor and we ended up flooding the kitchen and playing with water in the kitchen. Needless to say, we got our fair share of spankings.

-Not to forget the times when i fell asleep on my workbooks which we would buy from the Formula workshop or Leong agency and salivate all over them...i never finished them. haha

-and not to forget too, the countless fights i had with Sherny and Lyn. We were champion wrestlers then.

What are yours?

i look back and i thank God that He has blessed us so much. I look back and also realize all the energy and effort put in raising 3 children. We only hope that all the sacrifices were worth it. And that when mum, papa, ahma and mama, ahkong and all the aunties and uncles (biological and not biological) look at us, they would be proud.

Elections

‘Americans never quit. We never surrender. We never hide from history, we make history.’

 -John McCain, in his Concession Speech, after losing to Barack Obama in the US Presidential campaign

 

Indeed, the much talked and discussed about US Presidential campaign has finally come to an end. It really has been an interesting journey. After all the immense resources spent on campaigning, I am very much grateful that the next President of the USA has been elected. I think that the money spent on campaigning should have been put to better use.

 Listening to Barack Obama’s winning speech, I can’t help wonder whether are there any hidden agendas. Then again, I’m sure all politicians have ‘other agendas’. Where did they get all the money for their campaigns? From private investors I reckon. It’s interesting to see how Barack’s stand on pro-choice, stem cell research and homosexuality marriages would affect the local and global community.

I’ve only took a recent interest in ‘adult-y’ things recently, must be due to the whole realization that hey, I’m growing up and pretty soon, I’ve to fend for myself (haha) in this Beautifully created place called Earth but has been polluted by us.

Barack’s winning speech was certainly inspiring while John’s one was filled with grace and humility. Both I’m sure are great leaders and we can all learn a thing from do.

Man, just read about Proposition 8. A motion being voted in California that will either legalize or NOT gay marriages.

In the midst of all this, what does a Child of the Most High do?

On his knees.

Some of the things I will be praying for tonight (so that you can pray with me too):

-The USA and that God's will for the country will come forth

-Persecuted brothers and sisters in the the country of Uganda

-A very special brother who i deeply miss and love serving Him in the country of Indonesia

-A sister who received good news

-A brother who is leaving for Malaysia after finishing his studies here in Adelaide

-Myself, that i will stay true to Him and to what He has called me to.